Feeling rubbish

[LucyLou]

I don't really feel like I'm doing so great. Just a bit sad/tearful. I haven't brushed my hair properly since last sat and my friend has said she'll help me sort it but I feel embarrassed it's a bit if a mess. I don't know if it's knowing I don't have a session this week that has made me feel worse, she only told me last tues that we wouldn't be speaking this week and I guess a weeks notice is reasonable but it's rubbish. I hate missing a session. My head is on one, you know when you just have all the rubbish there all the time. If it's not me thinking about all the things I don't want to, I replay situations and conversations constantly and it's more the conversations I have with my therapist, I can distract myself through the day and how I've come across/if she believes me (my issues, it's not her)....I'll mostly sleep and sometimes music. It's worse at night, when everything is quiet. This isn't fair. I didn't want any of this sh*t

 

[Susan Jane]

I don't really feel like I'm doing so great. Just a bit sad/tearful. I haven't brushed my hair properly since last sat and my friend has said she'll help me sort it but I feel embarrassed it's a bit if a mess. I don't know if it's knowing I don't have a session this week that has made me feel worse, she only told me last tues that we wouldn't be speaking this week and I guess a weeks notice is reasonable but it's rubbish. I hate missing a session. My head is on one, you know when you just have all the rubbish there all the time. If it's not me thinking about all the things I don't want to, I replay situations and conversations constantly and it's more the conversations I have with my therapist, I can distract myself through the day and how I've come across/if she believes me (my issues, it's not her)....I'll mostly sleep and sometimes music. It's worse at night, when everything is quiet. This isn't fair. I didn't want any of this sh*t

If you can, let your friend help. I had a friend over last weekend, she helped me clean my windows, and it was hard for me. I was embarrassed. She doesn’t understand my trauma, my sadness and loneliness, but she also told me, she wanted to help me because she cares about me. We talked too and she said something interesting. She sees me as a completely normal human, the differences between us are that I feel my feelings 5 times more than she does and there is nothing wring with me. She and I grew closer when I let her see the side of me I hide. It felt scary and yet I felt much better to be able to be myself, with all my insecurities Be nice to yourself, no it isn’t your fault, no-one would choose to feel awful. Unfortunately, only we have the power to get out of it. Therapists are very helpful, I got lucky after 40 years I found a good one, he helps guide me to myself and shows me new perspectives. I am rooting for you…. BTW messy hair sometimes looks great

 

[Rorster93]

Please be kind to yourself and take EXTRA care of yourself, like caring for a child but the child is you and you are the parent. Maybe this can be a discussion with your therapist when you next see them, that you feel this way when you miss a session. Your therapist can give you tips on how to cope.

 

[deno]

I used to get so anxious leading up to a session—overthinking every possible way it could go—then never wanted it to end when I was actually in it. And yet, no session ever turned out the way I stressed over.

Missing a session can be tough, and I know for me, sometimes it was also a form of avoidance. Like part of me wanted the break, but another part felt unmoored without it. It’s hard when you have all these thoughts building up with nowhere to put them.

If you can, let your friend help. I know how embarrassing it can feel, but sometimes letting people in—even in small ways—can remind us that we’re still connected, even when it doesn’t feel like it.