Feeling Whole Again.

[freyjacat]

So it's been just over a year since I was diagnosed with PTSD. A long road it's been since then.

Most recently, I told my dad my biggest secret, that my brother abused me and my other sibling as kids. I finally no longer feel ashamed or bashful of myself for what I had no control over.

After telling my family and facing my true demons, I have began to find wholeness again. I also have a new found love for myself. I had been out of work for a year, but have since been employed for 6 months. I still have flashbacks and nightmares, but for the most part, I feel way better.

Letting out my secrets is where my recovery began.

 

[The Albatross]

Congratulations... and also on your employment. Very glad you've found loving kindness for yourself and that you are feelin better!

 

[EveHarrington]

Congrats!

The truth can be incredibly freeing!

:)

 

[blacksands]

@Hnoss I find your post inspiring. I currently am in the process of sorting through all of my emotions, and starting the process of learning to love myself. Your post gives me hope that I can overcome this.

 

[RavenGirl]

@Hnoss , June will be a year for me since I was diagnosed and started therapy. I am doing great compared to last year and working it out in my head how I'm going to tell my parents that my brother abused me!

I congratulate you on having the courage to voice what happened to your parents, as I'm still having a hard time finding the words. I can tell others, but to say it to my parents terrifies me. Yet I know it will be the ultimate freedom and healing for my soul. Thanks, you are an inspiration for me to keep pushing forward. Congratulations on your great journey! ! :hug:'s Raven

 

[freyjacat]

@Hnoss , June will be a year for me since I was diagnosed and started therapy. I a...

I am incredibly delayed and for that I am sorry. I had forgotten my log in info :banghead:
I hope you found that freedom and have been able to heal a bit since then. I am still going through the healing process with my family. It is a slow process, but I believe it will be worth it. If you are still active, please let me know how it's going :)

 

[RavenGirl]

I am doing good. I told me parents two months after I wrote that post, almost exactly a year from when I called out my abuser. :tup: It was probably one of the most anxiety ridden yet freeing things that I've done. I now am able to talk about my PTSD and the abuse... so I'm really doing pretty good.I can't believe the difference in my life.

I can stay with honesty that the sometimes painful moments of the healing process are so worth any stress or pain we have to go through to gain our self worth, sanity, and lives back. Yes, it's definitely worth it. yes, it's definitely worth it. :hug::hug::hug:Raven

 

[freyjacat]

I am doing good. I told me parents two months after I wrote that post, almost exactly a year from whe...

That's awesome! Most anxiety ridden and most freeing, I completely get that. I really feel like no one I know really understands, but it's comforting to know you get it

I hope it keeps getting better and better. Three years on, I still have these moments where I really FEEL my progress. It's a wonderful thing.

 

[RavenGirl]

Yes, learning to stand up for ourselves is very scary and freeing all at the same time. I think for me that's what I was doing when I told my parents what happened. They didn't listen to me as a child when I tried to tell them, I was silenced. So I now have trouble speaking up for myself when I'm wronged. So it was terrifying but freeing and validating all aft the same time.

I work at a school and the teacher in the last hour class has been really giving me a hard time. I talked to him first, that didn't work so I went to the people above. The principal talked to him, the same thing happened again. I went to the principal and my boss, and just this Thursday he did the same thing again!!! WTF!? Even escalating the whole thing. So I reported him to the teacher I work under, again... I told her everything he did and said to me. She told me she'd go to our boss and the principal and see what she could do because What he did was "in no way acceptable!"

I'm very proud of myself, before therapy I NEVER would of reported that teacher because I would of been to scared / anxious to do it. Yes, growth can be great but oh so terrifying at the same time!! I'm definitely still a work in progress. ❤:hug:;):tup: