Finally Introducing Myself

[brokenchild]

Non abuse history:
Grandma (who I lived with) died when I was 7
Grandpa (who I lived with) died when I was 14.
Mom died when I was 11 of AIDS.
Custody battles growing up until I was 11.
Very active growing up

Abuse history:
Physical abuse that resulted in a fractured vertebra
Sexual abuse including being trafficked to Prague
Psychological/emotional abuse that has stripped me of my self worth (working on that)

Currently:
Working full time at a nursing home in the rehabilitation department
Graduated college with a Bachelor's in psychology
Prepping for a powerlifting competition next year
Taking dance classes at Arthur Murray
Will be taking classes starting in January so I can be a physical therapist or a physical therapist assistant

 

[krystina]

Nice career!

 

[Tirnanog]

Hi Brokenchild
You have so many positive things listed under "Currently!" I am impressed with the power lifting competition! That must take a lot of hard work and dedication!!

I was just reading another one of your threads "Self-worth and depression" and I too struggle with self-worth and depression. I am not sure if my negative feelings are linked to any one cause or if I just haven't given myself a chance to view myself any other way. I was able to relate to a lot of the feelings you have. As I continued to read through your thread I was both in shock and awe. I am shocked at what you were forced to deal with and struggle with the right words to respond to your experience. I think that the "baby steps" that you are taking are very positive. I think that you are really working hard on yourself and if you look at all of the things that you have accomplished and continue to work on in your "Currently" section you deserve to treat yourself to some pampering! You DESERVE to be good to yourself. You DESERVE to have nice things. You DESERVE to have others be good to you and you DESERVE to believe it! As someone who also struggles with their self-worth I am sure you don't look at your accomplishments and think of them as that big of a deal (but they are!) and I bet it is hard for you to take compliments (isn't it? ;)) - I know it it hard for me -I take them the wrong way and feel like others are just joking around with me and having fun at my expense. But I want to pay you a compliment and I hope that you believe it. I think that it is awesome that you have been able to dedicate so much time to yourself that you are preparing for a powerlifting competition! Not everyone can do that! I know I can't! You should be very proud of yourself! Just looking at the things that you are "currently" doing I am very impressed. You seem like a very cool person. It can be hard for me to express myself at times and I hope that I have made sense here. ;)

 

[brokenchild]

krystina - I'm just a tech. I do the transporting of the patients, copying/filing, scheduling, etc. My coworkers appreciate me a lot and miss me when I'm gone. I "keep them in line" so they tell me.

nsifib - I don't look at my "accomplishments" as being "real" accomplishments. I just feel they're all fake somehow. It's ALWAYS been hard to take compliments. I just figure people are trying to be nice, or to get me to do something for them.

Working out is the only thing that keeps me halfway sane. I (normally) really love lifting weights, so it was an obvious choice to make. We'll just have to see how I do.

You made perfect sense, no worries. ;)

 

[Nicolette]

Now you've officially introduced yourself it is my honor to officially welcome you :wave:

 

[cherryblossom]

Welcome to the forum :peekaboo:

 

[Nyx]

:love: Good for you for introducing your self. You do have accomplishments and I hope one day you will be able to become proud of who you are and your capacities. One day...:applause:

 

[Crusoe]

Firstly hiya BC and secondly WOW!!! I was really taken aback (in a very positive way) to read that you have managed to achieve so many positive things with your life after having endured such very hard beginnings. I think that there are very few people in this world who could accomplish so much in your situation so I am really in awe of you hun.

 

[lilstar]

Welcome to the forum brokenchild

 

[brokenchild]

Thanks for all the welcomes and kind words. As said above, I'm not good with compliments, but I do thank you.

 

[anthony]

Welcome along here brokenchild.

 

[sisterinsurvival]

Hi brokenchild,

Welcome to the forum. I hope you find help and healing here.

Take care,
sisterinsurvival