Sufferer Introducing myself and seeking understanding

[Raji]

In my fifty years of life, 40 were spent in trauma. I made a list. All the applicable human rights as set forth by the UN were violated, long-term. I experienced brainwashing; torture; physical, emotional and verbal abuse; beatings and attempted murder; a physically forced abortion; being stalked; being kidnapped and raped repeatedly everyday for months; my family members were people who exhibited an evil unnaturalness and severe mental illnesses; there was constant sexual harassment and unwanted touching. I experienced financial and bodily manipulation, control coercion by others as well as serious abuse and neglect by therapists and doctors and hospitals. I was polydrugged and experienced awful side effects for a long period of time and the medications caused damage to my body. I felt I became brain damaged, I had no self.

I write all this and there is no feeling to it all for some reason. I wanted to impart the sense of fear, terror, horror, shock, trauma, war-like, nightmare/movie-like quality of my life. It was non-stop.

I survived. I'm doing well today. My struggle is to be seen and heard, understood and believed, by another human being.

 

[Riley Jones]

In my fifty years of life, 40 were spent in trauma. I made a list. All the applicable human rights as set forth by the UN were violated, long-term. I experienced brainwashing; torture; physical, emotional and verbal abuse; beatings and attempted murder; a physically forced abortion; being stalked; being kidnapped and raped repeatedly everyday for months; my family members were people who exhibited an evil unnaturalness and severe mental illnesses; there was constant sexual harassment and unwanted touching. I experienced financial and bodily manipulation, control coercion by others as well as serious abuse and neglect by therapists and doctors and hospitals. I was polydrugged and experienced awful side effects for a long period of time and the medications caused damage to my body. I felt I became brain damaged, I had no self.

I write all this and there is no feeling to it all for some reason. I wanted to impart the sense of fear, terror, horror, shock, trauma, war-like, nightmare/movie-like quality of my life. It was non-stop.

I survived. I'm doing well today. My struggle is to be seen and heard, understood and believed, by another human being.

Thank you for sharing your story. It's incredibly brave to open up about the experiences you've had. The strength you've shown in surviving and now doing well is remarkable. In this community, we understand the deep impact such trauma can have and the isolation it can bring. You're not alone here.

Many here have faced similar battles and find solace in sharing their stories and supporting each other. It can be incredibly healing to connect with those who truly understand the journey you've been on. I encourage you to explore the various forums on myptsd.com where you can share more, ask questions, and engage with others who will see, hear, and believe you.

Remember, while peer support is valuable, professional help can also be important if you feel it's right for you. We’re here to support you in whatever ways you need.

 

[Sideways]

Welcome to the forum - sorry that you have reason to be here.

 

[Dark.Green.Feathers]

I see you, I’m sorry for the horrors you’ve been though :(

 

[PlainJane]

Welcome

 

[parrotthepolly]

Welcome, hope you are healing.

 

[empathuniverse]

Welcome - I hope you are in a place where you can dictate your own life now?
In light of all you have experienced. There are true horrors in this world but they can teach us to have compassion and to value the power of love in this world as part being able to heal it and change it.