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Food triggers

  • Post starter Post starter Deleted member 31998
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Deleted member 31998

The last two and a half years have been great for conquering my issues around certain foods that I was forced to eat during the years of trauma. While in Costco yesterday, I was walking through the bakery to get to dishware. The smell...was that of raisin pitas. I had forgotten that food item for so long. Then I saw it. I left without a purchase, feeling quite nauseated.

Anyone else have issues around food? Food Triggers of any kind? How do you deal with it?
 
For a long time I couldn't even look at rice. The association with maggots was too strong. Sometimes I swear I even saw the rice move.

It did wear off eventually. I'd guess that the fact that I was working in a part of Asia where people eat rice for every meal I was getting inadvertent exposure therapy :)
 
I get triggered each day I choose to venture out or log in online now that I've switched my consumption habits to only whole food/plant-based/vegan stuff.

I also live within ear shot of a dairy farm and have to often hear the sorrowful cries of the baby calves and mama cows so the humans who still choose to consume dairy can have their bodily secretions.

Free exposure therapy all day long, every day, be it in real life or online.

I also have to pull over quite often when I see the fields full of livestock just to cry and release the emotions of knowing what they're facing.

It adds a whole new level of dealing with my own cptsd issues of having my body violated and used solely for the pleasure of others, that's for damn sure.

I deal with it by releasing the emotions in the moment the healthiest way I know how. I sometimes fail in those efforts.
 
It's more like 'What food *can* I eat' :hilarious:

How do I work through it? Reminding myself I've, indeed, eaten worse to live. & That living is my only goal.
Usually, when I simplify to something familiar (hello, survival), I just get through it. Stubborness. Shrug.
 
Lack of food can trigger me, as well as cold food ( that's meant to be hot)...luckily, the foods that do trigger me I will no longer come across, as a rule.

I simply refuse to eat food that isn't of a decent quality, and always make sure that I have plenty of food in the freezer...so that I know that I have the choice, whether I wish to eat or not.
 
Water is one of the hardest. I don't drink water, as a rule. If I am drinking water? I'm also usually armed. Or sick as hell.

Food in general is... Difficult. During my good years I learned to treat food like a hedonistic experience in order to get around the worst bits of it. Lots of potlucks and parties, themes & other things to concentrate on that were distracting from the food itself. Without a whole lot of other layers added to food (sensory, social, etc.) eating isn't impossible, just very very challenging. Bless Bohemia*.

ETA, Since we're international & not all frames of reference translate; Bohemian Eating / "How bohemian" refers back to Left Bank Paris & at a bare minimum requires eating whilst smoking, and often doing many many other things all at the same time as "dining". Very much in quotation marks, as all rules of etiquette (including 'don't climb onto the table' ;)) are uniformly thrown out the window.
 
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The smell of fish makes me gag, although I don't have any negative emotions or memories linked to it. What does trigger me is decision-making processes around food. Deciding what I want to eat is very difficult. Deciding to cook something is something that I do twice a month, if I'm having a good month. (Thanks dad, for asking me what I wanted to eat, and then telling me I was wrong.)
 
Way too many triggers to list. So much of food is hard. And sometimes it's not the food. I can't sit at a dining room table to eat, without getting ..edgy at best. About the only place I do eat at a dining room table is with my family of choice, and it's gotten better with them, but there are still moments when I trigger. Preparing food is a trigger. Doing dishes is a trigger. Blah.

And I will never (unless it's a true eat or die situation) eat green beans. Nope. Not going to.
 
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