Funny Family Stories!

[Lady of Longbourn]

I know a lot of people here have a hard time with there family's...but I'm trying to focus of the good right now! The good (we can do that, right?)...or maybe just the funny.

Okay here's my first story...

When I was about 15 ( so not to long ago lol), we went to visit my grandparents. I love them, but at the time I thought going to a little tiny town, in one of the least most populated states in the Untied States would be boring. :eek:

My grandfather loves fishing, and with a big river about 2 miles from there house, of course we had to go. Being a teenager at the time, I had to make a face. You know...put on a " I don't want to goooo!" show. LOL

So we went. Life jackets, snacks. Live bait ( gross). Soda ( or pop as my grandfather calls it). I'm sure he had some candy there somewhere.

Mid-summer and it was still cold with the wind. We liked stopping at the sand bars. Some can be big, with lots to look at. We stopped at one, my grandfather could only get the boat about 10 feet from the shore. So I got out...started running. All the sudden, there no ground under me and I'm down. Under the water. It's freezing! I re-surface, and climb out as fast as I can. The wind was a hell of a lot colder then.

I turn to look at my grandfather, he looks all solemn...and says " I saw that hole."

LOL. Life lesson,and funny! :) I miss my grandparents....:(

 

[AdamAnt]

Once we were at my uncles for family Thanksgiving dinner when my "other" uncle picked up my ex's keys that had a mace key chain. He didn't know what it was, asked, and as he was asking pushed the wrong buttons and it sprayed...which cleared the house for about a half hour! But wait! that's not the funny part.....somewhere in the middle of there he had gone to the bathroom and got traces of the mace from his hands onto his privates..hehehe...about half-way through dinner, he started squirming and finally had to excuse himself cause the mace was burning up his privates! I guess he learned a life lesson too! HA!

 

[atl22]

Just a quick one:
My cousin and I went to eat lunch but we only had enough money for one soda.
We agreed to split it. Before I realized it, he had finished the entire soda. I asked him "Weren't we supposed to split the soda?"
"Yes" he said "but my half was at the bottom!"

 

[Jawn]

ROFLMAO! That's a good one. I'll bet he never maces his privates again! :D

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

Those are both tooo funny!

I wish I could add another story...but my mind is blank. I know there's a lot, being married to my husband and with a family like mine, and just being ME ...I'll think of something.

 

[rpgamber]

I went with my Uncle to the hospital when he had to have his second craniotomy. The doctor came in and asked "Do you know why you are here?" and my uncle, without missing a beat, replied "to give you a piece of my mind."

 

[intothelight]

We were in mass and there is always a "quiet" moment after the Eucharist. It must have been lent as our priest was wearing purple vestments. All of the sudden my youngest daughter, two or three at the time, looked up and shouted..

"Mom, it's Barney!".

No quiet moment of reflection in mass that day. She brought down the house or in this case the sanctuary.

 

[goingonhope]

My son is at the age where he has questions regarding sex. So he asked me one day, "Mommy, when a man has sex do they put there balls in too?" :roflmao:

ROTFLMAO

 

[Nicolette]

Don't have any funny stories to tell but just found these....

 

[Abrasky]

lol at all the above.
My mum was taking me for a driving lesson on a quiet road.She drove the way back and I heard this funny thumping noise and looked out the window and saw the back tyre rolling in and out like it wasn't connected to the car:O_o:. It freaked me out but I laughed about it as I told my mother the back wheel was falling off.We stopped and had to walk through a pooped out dairy paddock to a house to get help.

 

[ISupportHer]

My son is at the age where he has questions regarding sex. So he asked me one day, "Mommy, when a man has sex do they put there balls in too?" :roflmao:

ROTFLMAO

I'm still waiting for the answer to that question! :confused:
.
.
:roflmao:

 

[Serene]

The other day my 2 year old granddaughter was at my house. She started taking magnets off of the refrigerator. She was fascinated by the way they pulled toward each other. I collected some more magnets from around the house and we sat on the floor and played with them. When I took her back home later that day she ran to her mother and said, "Mommy, maggots are sticky!"