Healing Reins
Gold Member
Even after last weekend, I don't know how I'm able to type this..it's a miracle.
For the past year I have felt bounded by my rapist. I have felt like I have had to only like him because I had sex with him. I for the longest time felt trapped, and for the first time ever I'm not feeling trapped. There is this guy I like at school..I can't tell if he likes me, but he asked me when prom was.. and told me that prom might be fun to go to, and keeps dropping hints about prom, and I'm excited for once! I feel like I don't have this cloud over me anymore. I feel like it's starting to lift and I'm starting to see how many great guys there are out there, and my rapist isn't one of them! The best part is; I get giggly in front of him, I laugh, I smile, I joke around, I am able to flirt again. I feel like I'm starting to become normal again. It's taken exactly a year to get to this place, but I'm starting to see the progress. I'm starting to see that I can have relationships again. I'm starting to see that It's okay if I have a crush on a guy, and I'm allowed to go to prom with someone who isn't my rapist. I'm allowed to be free...it feels really good.
For the past year I have felt bounded by my rapist. I have felt like I have had to only like him because I had sex with him. I for the longest time felt trapped, and for the first time ever I'm not feeling trapped. There is this guy I like at school..I can't tell if he likes me, but he asked me when prom was.. and told me that prom might be fun to go to, and keeps dropping hints about prom, and I'm excited for once! I feel like I don't have this cloud over me anymore. I feel like it's starting to lift and I'm starting to see how many great guys there are out there, and my rapist isn't one of them! The best part is; I get giggly in front of him, I laugh, I smile, I joke around, I am able to flirt again. I feel like I'm starting to become normal again. It's taken exactly a year to get to this place, but I'm starting to see the progress. I'm starting to see that I can have relationships again. I'm starting to see that It's okay if I have a crush on a guy, and I'm allowed to go to prom with someone who isn't my rapist. I'm allowed to be free...it feels really good.
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