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Sufferer Hello And Intro

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TruelyTasha

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Hi there!

I'm Tasha, and I'm a 30 year old woman with PTSD. For me it started when I was 5 with around three years of sexual abuse by my babysitter's husband. I buried everything, "forgot", and never told a soul until I was a young adult. As a child and teenager, I was subject to my parents failing marriage and domestic violence.

This left me as a first year in college, severely depressed. With little support, I made it through college, mainly sleeping and attending class alternately. After transferring to an out of state school 1,000 miles from my home, I scraped through college and graduated with a B.S. in Ecology. After returning to my hometown to work with a camp for a summer, I made the treck back to school with one class to complete my degree. I became severely depressed, and after a week of arguing, broke up with my girlfriend.

After pressure from my mother, I made plans to return to my hometown. Severely depressed, I spent the school year working for a local middle school and the camp where I had previously worked. One day at the camp while I was overseeing the zipline an accident occurred and we had to call a "code" on an injured camper. I handled the situation perfectly, until I couldn't calm down afterwards. Within a week I was self-harming and suicidal and had to be hospitalized at the local psychiatric facility. It was like my world had blown up in my face.

After being diagnosed with DID, I was repeatedly hospitalized and my family didn't know what to do. I got awarded disability payments and SSI but it was never enough for me to live on my own.Years passed in a blurred cycle of hospitalizations, self-harm, dependency on my family and never ending depression. Nightmares and insomnia plagued my life.

I slipped into a pattern of running away, and moved back and forth between my hometown and Boston, Massachusetts. I've made the 1,000+ mile journey many times, and moved around often, and even was homeless for a short amount of time.

While in one hospital, I met my current partner, though the relationship would take a while to develop. She has been an incredibly stabilizing force in my life, and with the help of a therapist and groups, I am at a place where I have stopped running. I am now focused on moving towards employment and hope to start working again part-time within the next few months, and return to school for a certificate program for medical laboratory technicians in the fall.

That's a little blurb about me, I am happy meet you all!
 
Welcome. Nice to meet you, Tasha. I just joined yesterday and I think it's a big step for you and I, both. Everyone here has been very friendly and helpful, which I could not be more thankful for. I'm sorry that you had those experiences. That must have been very hard for you.

They say that there is a season for everything and at some point, some things will have to come to an end so that something new will be able to grow and flourish. It sounds like you've planted the seeds of a new relationship now and are beginning to work towards it. I understand it's hard starting something new. It took me a while to be comfortable in a relationship again, but that's part of the process. It's a healing thing.

Cheers! To a new life and new beginning!
 
Welcome Tasha,

I've been coming here almost six months now. It's a safe place to hang out, to learn and even just to vent.
 
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