AngelKeeperJ
Sponsor
Hi, (((Brad)))
I am the daughter of a retired missionary pastor, so grew up in a very pentecostal, strict, and starchy home, and 'religion' was forced on me till I was 16 and refused to go. The church we belonged got very 'emotional', which led me to believe that when I felt that 'deep emotion', it was God's spirit. That led me to make many, many wrong decisions. I would hate for you to struggle more years than you need to. (((hug)))
I believe the presence of God can be felt anywhere at any time. When the focus is on the spiritual 'high' that can be achieved in a worship service, it can make one think they should feel that way all the time. It doesn't happen that way, unfortunately.
I believe that God loves us more than we can know or understand, and I do believe he 'guides and teaches' us rather punishing us. We may 'go in circles' with our lives, always making the same mistakes, until we figure out for ourselves what we believe. I believe he waits to be 'invited' before he 'works' in our lives'. Do yourself a big favor, and get this figured out before you get any older!
My belief allows me to feel peace and love, when I might have otherwise chosen anger, and acted it out. You can find peace, and I hope you will. Listen to your inner 'gut' feelings (unless they are suicidal) and you will learn as you go through life. NONE of us know what is ahead until the days arrive, one day at a time.
People that attend church, or chose to worship privately, begin to think that if they don't feel 'that feeling' everywhere else, that something is wrong with them. It isn't that, because believing in God is something you choose to do, and it stands stronger than any emotion. I also believe in the Divine Love that being a Christ-like follower can bring. It does NOT have to be in a church!
I will be frank. There are some mental issues, like a schizophrenia, associated with coming into the late teens. There is no way that an evaluation, and possible diagnosis could, or would hurt you. You deserve to be happy! Just because you have had suicidal ideations, it is important to find out if you have a problem as early in life as you can! Even if you are feeling better. It could happen again.
You have so much to look forward to, unless you do have a real medical, chemical, or hormone problem. More than likely, it probably won't go away on it's own. Asking for help may feel 'weak', but it takes courage.
I implore you to find that courage to let your parents know so you can get help. They will feel honored that you can tell them. That's how I felt when I found out what my son was messed up in a few years ago. I 'knew' in my heart something wasn't 'quite right, so when he told me, I was relieved, and then I was able to help him. They might be wondering if there is something up with you, and don't know how to talk about it.
One last thing. If you are smoking pot, or doing any other mooda-altering drug, they can cause the type feelings you are describing. Paranoia is NOT fun, and if that's what happens, don't do them. I'll be honest. I smoke pot, but I am OLD and paranoid anyway, lol, and it's too late for me and I'm ok with that. It's for physical pain issues , and I'm much nicer to deal with quite frankly.
Don't give up, and remember that you are NOT alone with your feelings. There are people here looking for a chance to help you.:tup:
I am the daughter of a retired missionary pastor, so grew up in a very pentecostal, strict, and starchy home, and 'religion' was forced on me till I was 16 and refused to go. The church we belonged got very 'emotional', which led me to believe that when I felt that 'deep emotion', it was God's spirit. That led me to make many, many wrong decisions. I would hate for you to struggle more years than you need to. (((hug)))
I believe the presence of God can be felt anywhere at any time. When the focus is on the spiritual 'high' that can be achieved in a worship service, it can make one think they should feel that way all the time. It doesn't happen that way, unfortunately.
I believe that God loves us more than we can know or understand, and I do believe he 'guides and teaches' us rather punishing us. We may 'go in circles' with our lives, always making the same mistakes, until we figure out for ourselves what we believe. I believe he waits to be 'invited' before he 'works' in our lives'. Do yourself a big favor, and get this figured out before you get any older!
My belief allows me to feel peace and love, when I might have otherwise chosen anger, and acted it out. You can find peace, and I hope you will. Listen to your inner 'gut' feelings (unless they are suicidal) and you will learn as you go through life. NONE of us know what is ahead until the days arrive, one day at a time.
People that attend church, or chose to worship privately, begin to think that if they don't feel 'that feeling' everywhere else, that something is wrong with them. It isn't that, because believing in God is something you choose to do, and it stands stronger than any emotion. I also believe in the Divine Love that being a Christ-like follower can bring. It does NOT have to be in a church!
I will be frank. There are some mental issues, like a schizophrenia, associated with coming into the late teens. There is no way that an evaluation, and possible diagnosis could, or would hurt you. You deserve to be happy! Just because you have had suicidal ideations, it is important to find out if you have a problem as early in life as you can! Even if you are feeling better. It could happen again.
You have so much to look forward to, unless you do have a real medical, chemical, or hormone problem. More than likely, it probably won't go away on it's own. Asking for help may feel 'weak', but it takes courage.
I implore you to find that courage to let your parents know so you can get help. They will feel honored that you can tell them. That's how I felt when I found out what my son was messed up in a few years ago. I 'knew' in my heart something wasn't 'quite right, so when he told me, I was relieved, and then I was able to help him. They might be wondering if there is something up with you, and don't know how to talk about it.
One last thing. If you are smoking pot, or doing any other mooda-altering drug, they can cause the type feelings you are describing. Paranoia is NOT fun, and if that's what happens, don't do them. I'll be honest. I smoke pot, but I am OLD and paranoid anyway, lol, and it's too late for me and I'm ok with that. It's for physical pain issues , and I'm much nicer to deal with quite frankly.
Don't give up, and remember that you are NOT alone with your feelings. There are people here looking for a chance to help you.:tup:
