Holidays

[Casey_03]

Like many others on this forum, I am dreading the upcoming holidays. The holidays are always a nightmare for me, and I tend to just curl up into a ball and try to hibernate through them, but this year will be a million times worse -- I work overseas in a foreign country, where the Christmas holidays run from Dec 23 - Jan. 13. These are public holidays here, so I am off work for all of this time. Work is the only thing that gives me some structure and provides a good distraction, so now, knowing that I cannot work for these three weeks, I am terrified. To make matters worse, I am not in therapy as I cannot afford it, all of my friends and acquaintances have gone home to be with their families for this time, and because of the recent crash of Russia's currency (which has seen my income halved), I literally have no money to do anything over the break. Essentially all of the things I have used to cope with my PTSD have now been cut off. I will be completely alone with myself, cooped up in my apartment, for three weeks. I have no loved ones or anyone to reach out to during this time, and I don't know what to do. In the past, I have tried to simply weather the storm by reading and watching movies when I have to be at home alone, but I've never had to do that for so long. I feel trapped and fear I will have some sort of breakdown.

 

[Glara]

This post indicates you are in Russia, does Russia have any types of support groups or programs you can attend? Or maybe even some type of volunteer work for the poor that often needs additional help during the holidays. Something like that could maybe fill the void of what work usually does for you.

My sufferer says his job depresses him. He complains often about different aspects if it, but he too uses it as a distraction. I think he'd be feeling like you are if he couldn't work for 3 weeks.

I wish I could offer more suggestions. The holidays can be so difficult even without ptsd and to be away from home and routine and have ptsd it must be very frustrating.

 

[RussH]

casy, are there some volunteer groups you can join to keep yourself active. A soup kitchen where you can help out,or a shelter, or a group that works with the elderly?

 

[shandemonium]

I was about to suggest the same thing as everyone else! I used to work with the homeless in San Fran, and not only our staff but many of the volunteers were people just like us who feel terrible around the holidays and need somewhere to go.

Also, I have no idea how any of that works in Russia, but in the US the need for volunteers is high on all the days right after Christmas. I mean, if you are feeling too sad to venture out on Christmas, try the days after or the days before (if volunteering) as there most likely will be a great need for your help and you will meet others who hate the holidays too! (they might not understand exactly how you feel, but at least they hate Christmas too!)

Hang in there during this time and come to the forum! We are here for you...

 

[Casey_03]

Thank you all for responding and offering support. I had hoped to do volunteer work over the break but it's not really a thing here -- there are no soup kitchens and orphanages don't let just anybody volunteer, you have to work your way in by knowing someone else who works there. Maybe I will find something else to do, like make food for the homeless and distribute it to them. Anyways, thanks again for the support.

 

[digger]

Is there anything you could make a project of in your apartment? If the structure of work is something that helps you, perhaps making up a schedule of jobs to be done around the apartment might help some? See it as an opportunity to tackle all the little jobs that need doing that you haven't had time to do maybe, make a list and spread them out over the three weeks..

 

[Friday]

2 questions to ponder...

What do you enjoy? & What can you do for free?

I go through periods of being completely broke, and while the transition is always hard... I forget about all the free stuff I do when I don't have money to go to cafés & sports & stuff. Like making a point to photograph things from awkward positions, or go read a book on a train until I feel like getting off, urban spelunking, etc.

When (I remember to) and I have some crazy making time in front of me... I make a big list of things to do. Because I won't remember what I like to do when I'm spinning out. That way, I can refer to the list, make some toast, and crawl back in bed thoroughly enjoying avoiding my plans for the day. <grin> Or, you know, actually pick something from the list & go do it.

 

[sun seeker]

In addition to the other suggestions, could you think of something you would like to learn and make that a project over the holidays? There are hundreds of excellent free tutorials you can find now on the Internet. Find something you've never gotten around to doing that you could make progress on in three weeks, and find instructions on how to do it. If the tutorial has structured lessons, so much the better, it will give you some of that structure you are missing at work, and learning something new helps us feel better about ourselves. When I hurt my hip this fall and was nearly immobile for a couple of weeks, I started knitting an afghan. Just an idea. It doesn't get you out of the apartment, but it might help.