Home as a trigger

[Gs172003]

I'm living in the same house from my childhood, which is across the street from the house where I was...

Do you ever feel like you just need to run? Like you have to get out of there but not sure why?

Here's a couple!

Dead Link Removed

If those sell out, I...

Thank you

 

[littleoc]

Do you ever feel like you just need to run? Like you have to get out of there but not sure why?

(Hugs)

 

[Gs172003]

@littleoc Thank you

 

[Deleted member 541]

Is the house really a trigger or just a stressor. I can’t figure out how your house could be a trigger. Stressor yes, if it’s cluttered as you say, and maybe that’s not the way you invisioned your home to be.

Or maybe you are just a running junkie.......

 

[Sideways]

Recreating your entire home so it feels safe, and like a place where you can build new memories? Is a big project. I’ve watched a friend have to do this after she was assaulted in her home.

Maybe start small. A single room, or a corner of a room, or a space in the yard. Focus on that small space, and ask yourself “What would a perfectly calming, soothing space just in this corner feel like?” And recreate that place so that it feels new, and somewhere in your house that is about safety and calm. Then make a point of going there occasionally with a cup of tea or some body lotion or something, and do 5 minutes in your calm space.

The rest of the house can be a project that grows from there.

It doesn’t need to be expensive. Repainting the walls is a big job. Posters? Are a small job! Swap furniture online to avoid costs if that’s an issue.

There’s lots of solutions to this. I live in a studio, and my patio is a space that I keep junk free and luxurious so that I can always go there, and just sit and breathe, and know that I’m in a space that I have created and recreated over time to be my own tiny corner of calm.

Just a few ideas:)

 

[Gs172003]

Recreating your entire home so it feels safe, and like a place where you can build new memories? Is a...

I'll try. The problem is the person I had the issues with lived with me. I feel like it's there. Can I tear it down and live in a tent or just sleep in a hammock? ( Kidding sorta)

But I will start with repainting and go from there

Is the house really a trigger or just a stressor. I can’t figure out how your house could be a trigger...

Or maybe not

I wish I knew how to explain this better but the words just aren't there

 

[Sideways]

Do you know what? If a hammock appeals to you? Give it a try. Try things out, even if they sound crazy it doesn’t matter. What matters is finding a way to make your home your safe place:)

 

[Gs172003]

Do you know what? If a hammock appeals to you? Give it a try. Try things out, even if they sound cr...

You know what?? I will. I have one. Thank you.

 

[shimmerz]

I know I'm very unique in this so.. now what?

Yeah, unfortunately I totally get you on this one. Was the reason I was homeless for 10 years. I have just gotten myself re-housed and have been living within 4 walls and a ceiling for a month and a half. Honestly, it is a nightmare being triggered by housing. My deepest sympathies to you.

One of the major players in my being successful in being able to stand living inside again is the MMJ that I started taking back in July/August of 2017. It ended up providing me with a larger window of tolerance. I can't say this has been easy, but I am working really hard on attempting to re-integrate the notion that perhaps I can be safe inside again.

I still can't go into my office here very easily. I worked on the bathroom by taking long hot bubble baths. Showers are still a big deal to me. I have a hard time with the bathroom door open AND closed. Completely lose my shit if someone knocks on my door - still. Figured out the bed after a few days of being here. I have to dose up big time in order to even walk into the bedroom. I just keep telling myself that this isn't going to beat me. I keep encouraging myself. Kindness is a big thing. Understanding that the reason I am like this in an enclosed space is because I was terrorized in an enclosed space for upwards of 2.5 years.

I say don't put yourself under too much stress by re-doing the whole place. I started with the kitchen, which triggered the shit out of me. I bought some essential oils to play with (to replace prepping food). I love my essential oils, so it helped me get back in to prep (a little) food. I like the idea of focusing on one room. Or one corner. Or any amount of space that you can claim as a safe place. Hell, I was even tempted to buy myself a kids 'castle' that I could hide in and call that safe.

Honestly, whatever you can do to claim safe space. Go there as often as possible. Move it around if you have different rooms. No idea if the castle appeals to you, but I think the key is in safety. Even just a corner that grows. I found this trigger got worse and worse with time and lack of attention so I encourage you to really sink your teeth into a plan.

 

[Gs172003]

Yeah, unfortunately I totally get you on this one. Was the reason I was homeless for 10 years. I hav...

Thank you so much

 

[shimmerz]

Of course. I know it feels impossible. It isn’t. PM me anytime if you need encouragement or ideas. My heart goes out to you.

 

[Gs172003]

Of course. I know it feels impossible. It isn’t. PM me anytime if you need encouragement or ideas. M...

Thanks again