Hope I'll be the last diary I'll ever write

[Givrali]

I slept 2h 3h ? I don't know what to do. Maybe it's too much for me. Heatness from hell too many tasks to do too many people to please too many new people and situations too many things to handle

 

[Givrali]

Since I didn't slept more than 3h this night it won't be a moral dilemma to cancel ergo today

 

[Givrali]

Everyone want me to do something different. Expect me to act differently. I can't just do what I want to do because I would end completely destroying my life. I'm completely lost about what I should do

 

[Givrali]

I'm so sorry I'm a mess I'm so sorry I destroyed everything I'm so sorry I can't do anything right. I'm so so so sorry

 

[Givrali]

I'm so sorry to be such a disappointment. I'm so sorry I destroyed my family I'm so sorry I was sick that my life was un danger. I'm so sorry for existing. I'm so sorry I can't be better I'm so sorry I tricked you by making you my friend I shouldn't talked to you. I'm so sorry

 

[Givrali]

Ok I have to let my emotions talk. But that makes me feel better and I don't deserve it even if some part of me do think I deserve to feel better

 

[Givrali]

Also people will have compassion for me and that's not right because I'm a monster

 

[Givrali]

Ok

Let's forget everything and just keep doing what I was doing like nothing happened

 

[Givrali]

So I got the thing to have internet in my computer but it's impossible to have internet because swisscom can't just drop the name and code they have to make it awfully complicated to obtain

 

[Givrali]

Keep sorting my books since yesterday

 

[Givrali]

I moved my desk from my room to the opposite side of my home. Good thing my appartement is mainly square

 

[Givrali]

I just read today