Sufferer How To Confront My Pedophile Parent

[The Albatross]

I disagree a defensive lifestyle is fear based. Part of transcending victimhood it taking your voice back, setting boundaries, and calling out the dysfunction.

Why do you think fear is separate and apart when 1/3 of all is relationships?

 

[The Albatross]

The OP wants to set the boundary for the safety of the children... they said "confront". Three are stronger than one.

 

[The Albatross]

Why do YOU Cashew, view this as endangering? Just curious.

 

[Ronin]

Why do YOU Cashew, view this as endangering? Just curious.

I'm thinking about the children, and the fact OP doesn't seem ready to confront abuser in question about things, nor should be required to or be implied she's a coward one way or another for not doing that confrontation, while prioritizing safety of other affected people.

She was forced to confront him enough, in growing up near him and witnessing abuse of siblings, one she was gaslit about & pushed to silence in the first place. Seems to me it's fair to take a break & compose a coherent sense of self and action, first.

 

[The Albatross]

Well I guess the poster's word "confront" is in debate... only time will tell on that. A coherent sense of self and action to me however, would be to directly confront and set the boundary with a pedophile, hopefully with the sisters in tandem or having paved the way..

 

[The Albatross]

So there you have it in a nutshell Shadow... what will it be, defensive living or confrontation with or without your siblings?

 

[Ronin]

And we are clear that her father won't attempt to get in touch with the children 'because grand dad rights and he's a good person, how dare you insinuate I'm an abuser' by force because?

As I'm unclear to the scope of 'caused damage all around prior', as per OP's post. (Not requesting that OP goes into something publicly that wasn't disclosed in the original post. Just saying she probably knows how far he can go and for which reasons, something we may not see into, and resolute 'by all means go tell him what you feel about him', may not be the most informed course of action, at this point in time, while she's still collecting resources on how to tackle him & own security most of all.)

 

[The Albatross]

???

 

[Wicked Shadow]

So he has or has not abused your kids? I mean, it doesn't sound like it but your wording's not clear?...[/QUOTE

My dad had never been given the opportunity to hurt my children and never will.

 

[Wicked Shadow]

Well I guess the poster's word "confront" is in debate... only time will tell on that. A coherent...

My sisters will never see him again. They have zero contact.

 

[Wicked Shadow]

So there you have it in a nutshell Shadow... what will it be, defensive living or confrontation wit...

Confrontation hat slays been the point. He isn't my sister's dad so they aren't a part of this.

 

[Wicked Shadow]

I agree with the suggestion of a letter or email if you can't make the call. I actually think it may...

He lives far away so there is barely any contact as I don't call or answer his. I have already written a letter but have not sent it as it seemed a bit raw.