hugging my therapist is feeling like a drug

[SinkorSwim]

So funny thing is I really do not like being hugged at all. It's part of my therapy. I have a really hard time with letting people in and a history of csa. So at first she would help me ground by tapping my knee. When I get really bad and have a hard time grounding myself she will squeeze my hand or give me a hug. She always asks first so I can say no. I find it really helps with bringing me back to reality.

 

[loui50]

I had the same t for 9 years. I hugged her/she hugged me at the end of every session. For me, it was sort of like I pour my guts out for and hour and the hug helped me seal it all back up until next week. Now granted, there was no attraction as we were both females and both heterosexual. I did see her as a mom for a while though.

I can't hug my current t. I tried 2 times. The first time I had a really tough session and she asked what I needed and I told her I needed a hug and she agreed. It felt weird and nothing like hugging my previous t. The second time I asked for a hug after session it felt just as weird and I have never asked again. Honestly though, I do want a hug at the end of my session. I'm a hugger. It helps me process everything and be ok. I just get them from my husband now.

 

[susannahsays]

If you raise this issue with your T, it’s unlikely the response will be,
“Well let’s pull that rug out from under you - no more touching ever!”
More likely is that it will start a helpful conversation.

I really wish I could agree. I don't know if I'd say the response you outlined is likely per se, but it is not uncommon and it is something that I have heard of happening to multiple people. The client expresses something that spooks the therapist in some way, and the therapist pulls back and tries to regain control of the situation by tightening boundaries. I have indeed heard of hugs being taken away.