Hypersexuality to poss asexuality

[LucyLou]

Had my therapy earlier. I sent over what I needed to and we spoke about it and the way I don't want any kind of physical intimacy. She asked if I thought I was asexual, I said "I don't know, maybe" and it just made me think. I've gone from one end of the spectrum to the other. From hypersexuality to possible asexuality. She knows about the hypersexuality but we haven't properly gone into it, I don't even know my mindset at the time. It was just something I did....and kept doing but it was putting myself into these dangerous situations, looking back, I feel like I was pretty stupid. Is all of this any kind of normal?

 

[parrotthepolly]

Yeah it is "normal" after trauma. Same old story with lots of people, nothing out of the blue.

 

[arfie]

personally, i believe i am a serial rapist. being female, you can't rape the willing, but my hypersexuality was based on a rage level that would have equaled rape if i were male. when i healed far enough to lose the uncontrollable rage. the hypersexuality passed. so did my interest in sex. i still have erotic dreams but haven't even been totally celibate for over 10 years.

normal? asexual? androgynous? call ^it^ whatever makes my life work in your head. it is what it is whether i understand it or knot.

 

[Friday]

Both extremes, hypersexual & sexually anorexic / asexual / violently opposed to sex (all 3 are different)… as well as switching back and forth between them… are incredibly normal following sexual assault.

 

[Rose White]

Yeah I think it’s not unusual. Experienced something similar.

 

[PlainJane]

I bounce between

 

[Sideways]

Knowing that it’s normal for people (even without a history of trauma) to have their sexuality change over the course of their life, it actually makes a chuckle a bit to think that there’s a sexuality ‘box’ that we teenage our way into, and then stay in.

Once you add trauma, and post traumatic recovery into the mix, I think the more appropriate question is more like “what’s my sexuality right now?”

Not feeling it right now? That’s okay. Maybe it’s ‘Me’ time right now. Which is celebration-worthy, all on its own.

What you’ll want a year from now, with another year of change and recovery under your belt? Is who knows what!

 

[MKEPaul]

call ^it^ whatever makes my life work

This, right here, is proof of survival success. This is agency. This is calmly and surely navigating our past and our future into the now. After x-thousands of truly good therapy, it all comes down to this--here and now.

 

[Friday]

it actually makes a chuckle a bit to think that there’s a sexuality ‘box’ that we teenage our way into, and then stay in.

Teenage our way into. So. Much. This.

 

[Luna_Moth]

This is all a normal part of trauma. Though I think the word you’re looking for is hyposexuality, which is the opposite of hypersexuality. Asexuality as an orientation doesn’t automatically mean a lack of interest in sexual pleasure.

Regardless, anyone is welcome in the asexual community if they feel like they’re asexual. I think there is some controversy with a small select few because asexual people don’t want to be labeled as traumatized, but you can still be traumatized and be asexual.

You could also not be asexual at all and suffer from hyposexuality, which can make it confusing for the person experiencing it. I would probably bring this up with your therapist if you don’t think the asexual label suits your sexual orientation.

 

[Teasel]

From hypersexuality to possible asexuality.

This is very much my experience too.
It's almost completely switched off now, sexual interest I mean. I don't feel bothered about it either. I think I find the thought of anything sexual a bit repulsive now. For myself I mean.