I am a rotten person

[anthony]

I am just afraid sometimes as the things that I need to learn in the therapy are also the things that keep me from actually connecting and working with a therapist.

You just found your first real talking point with your therapist then. This needs to be worked out, so your therapy isn't a waste of time, energy and money.

 

[mylunareclipse]

Thank you Anthony. We will see. Sorry for not answering your questions. I just didn't know where to start from. Plus feel deeply ashamed about this topic as compared to other people this isn't such a bad experience so I don't know why it affected me so much.
Everything is confusing now. Laying in bed crying myself to sleep. Came up to the realization that I never think anything is bad enough or that I deserve any help or attention as I was brought up to believe this. I grew up with a cousin who lost her father as a toddler, therefore I wasn't allowed to have any needs or attention as she had it so much worse than me. She had no father.
Anyhow, sorry for going on a tangent, I guess could start a diary or something if I truly just want to write things.
Thank you

 

[mylunareclipse]

Met with a new therapist today for one hours. I was describing just a little bit about my work (thanks to our conversation here I decided to start with this first) and the abusive environment, and after a few minutes talking about my co-workers she is like : he sounds like a classical sociopathic narcissist to me. Do you know what that means? Do you want me to bring the DSM out so you believe me. That sounds like it would have been very hard to have to deal with him.
My whole body was in shock. I didn't need anything else. The validation of someone face to face with me was crazy.
Thank you guys. I guess it helped to not talk around things and just talk about things straightforward.

 

[Teasel]

Pleased for you :-)

 

[Marisea]

So happy you got the recognition you needed. I have found that this wasthe start of my healing. Best wishes