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I Feel A Decline Coming On.

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cherryblossom

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I don't know how to describe it really. I seem to have 3 moods. Ok, happy and depressed. With not much in-between. Maybe the in-betweens are there, but they are so brief, that I don't notice them.

I think I'm still learning to manage my PTSD and depression. I took too much on last week, and now I'm paying the price. My meeting at work next week is stressing me out, big time. But I've put off thinking about it for long enough, and now I can't put it off any longer.

But when I'm stressed, everything that stresses me appears. So, here I am stressed about work, but He (that rapist scum bag) rears his ugly head.

Sometimes, I seriously HATE being me.
 
Remove stressors one by one. This is the first thing I learned.

If thinking about the meeting next week stresses you out, take action. Plan ahead. Try to think what their reactions will be and how you will answer. Make little scenarios, even funny stories to distract yourself a little. Picture them in clown suits while they're telling you their "important" things. Anything to distract you but at the same time stop you avoiding the thoughts.

Go for walks and runs. Take someone with you to feel safe, and go out and move a little. This helps release the "happiness hormones" and improve your mood. It also helps your body relax a little.

Try to think what else stresses you out and if it's a real cause or just something that emerged from the past. If it's something that emerged, go back to the solution you found works for it. If it doesn't work, search for another solution.

And most importantly, talk talk and talk some more. Keep spilling your thoughts here, it relives over-analyzing and twisting our own words and thoughts.

Stay strong, Cherryblossom. You deserve good things and they are on their way.
 
Not sure I have any advice. :confused:

I do want you to know that I hear how you are feeling, and I am thinking about you and hoping all goes well.

You could always try that "Self fullfilling prophecy" Being POSITIVE that is, not negative. Expect all to go well, have a positive attitude and it might just work! I will be wishing the best for you!!
 
But when I'm stressed, everything that stresses me appears. So, here I am stressed about work, but He (that rapist scum bag) rears his ugly head.


I do the same thing!

Hopefully, recognizing it will help you manage. I know that over the last few weeks, when I have had the same thing happen, realizing what was going on and making those people who are a part of my support system aware has helped.
 
I have nightmares about my past when too stressed. The other night I woke up with the sorest jaw as I had been grinding my teeth for the time I did sleep. Stress heightens our views on everything and because issues compact, something you would normally cope with becomes unbearable when overloaded with stress.

I am slowly learning that you can't take stress by the horns and get it under control. You have to eliminate what is easiest and quickest to deal with first working back to the most difficult. With all the smaller issues out of the way it then leaves you in a better position to deal with the most stressful thing you are dealing with. Sometimes it may not make sense to do the simplest thing as it is probably not the most important however once removed it then lessens your stress so achieves a better outcome IMHO.
 
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