BlueWeepingRose
Silver Member
I was talking to one of my brother's friends on the phone. He's been comforting me about my brother's death for awhile. Only he did something that triggered me. My ex always acted hot and cold towards me, I was noticing it with my brother's friend. My mind gets confused sometimes, especially when I am triggered because I know triggers can happen so randomly. When it happened, I couldn't stop crying and my entire body was shaking. So I ended up putting on some meditation music on later on that night to help me sleep.
For some reason, I feel like I can't trust him. Not sure why, I just do. I'm usually relaxed when I talk to my friends, but something happened when I was talking to him. He was acting very hot and cold towards me, I could tell by his words, how he was acting towards me and his voice was very low and flat. This is when my body started reacting and I couldn't stop shaking, my hand was shaking and I began crying. Entire time I felt embarrassed but I couldn't help it, I just kept crying and crying. My ex came back into my mind again, because he used to speak to me like that. I guess his voice triggered me, I have no idea. This is what confuses me.
I'm probably sounding a little nuts right now, but when I get triggered, my body always shakes and I cry as if I am experiencing it again. This has been a very long time since I had any triggers like this. Which amazes me. He ended up apologizing to me and I forgave him. Ever since than he's been avoiding me and I believe it's because of my trigger. So I'm giving him space, because I am sure he's not used to something like that happening and probably still feels guilty. Only the night of that trigger, everything he did, triggered me. It always the way someone sounds, the tone in the voice. I believe that's what did it...
For some reason, I feel like I can't trust him. Not sure why, I just do. I'm usually relaxed when I talk to my friends, but something happened when I was talking to him. He was acting very hot and cold towards me, I could tell by his words, how he was acting towards me and his voice was very low and flat. This is when my body started reacting and I couldn't stop shaking, my hand was shaking and I began crying. Entire time I felt embarrassed but I couldn't help it, I just kept crying and crying. My ex came back into my mind again, because he used to speak to me like that. I guess his voice triggered me, I have no idea. This is what confuses me.
I'm probably sounding a little nuts right now, but when I get triggered, my body always shakes and I cry as if I am experiencing it again. This has been a very long time since I had any triggers like this. Which amazes me. He ended up apologizing to me and I forgave him. Ever since than he's been avoiding me and I believe it's because of my trigger. So I'm giving him space, because I am sure he's not used to something like that happening and probably still feels guilty. Only the night of that trigger, everything he did, triggered me. It always the way someone sounds, the tone in the voice. I believe that's what did it...
