I Hated Myself For The Abuse

[Deleted member 38242]

Yep, that is what criminals thrive on, I have been accused by criminals who attempted to rape me...

Big hugs to you my friend. I'm on that stalking list myself, but didn't know what was going on until this past year. I've been on both sides of the law kind of. I did drugs for a short, short, short time of life, but honestly hate them, so I quit. I don't turn the working girls in, but rather give them a water in the heat if I can, or just leave them be. I live in a poorer neighborhood, and honestly kind of love it. I used to do charity work with the homeless, and still give what I can here and there. I was bullied, and stalked really badly by people with money as a kid, and I suffer from social anxiety disorder when it comes to the "untouched" people.
I find if I just shut up, and mind my business the stalking, and group mobing isn't bad. But, if I say anything they just scare the bejesus out of me, and laugh when I flip out because I'm a retarded sweetheart when it comes to criminals. That's just my life I guess.
They say it's us, and our fault when the crap done made no sense to begin with, but whatever. Thank you so much for the post I'm not alone. It got bad for a while, and it hurt me badly mentally because I didn't know what was going on, but I can't do anything about it. 20 + years, and no that stalking will never stop. I'm just glad I was never physically touched by them. I know it could have been so much worse. I consider it a blessing that my body wasn't harmed. Living in the hood even if I live in a good one I understand it could have been much worse.

 

[missfrier]

I hated my self for the abuse 23 years later I am still trying to deal with it I still hate my self and I still blame my self for absue sending u hugs

 

[Deleted member 38242]

Hugs back at ya. It's a tough one.

 

[talon]

I don't know where to put this. My abuse was the worst young, and its a long story. But, I hated m...

It not easy when we feel we have an invisible tattoo which says abuse me. Many if timid or shy can invite abuse but that does not make it right. I learned to be assertive which is not the same as being aggressive. When in management I was often challenged and was taught a simple trick . In group bullying there is usually a leader . The thing to remember is that bullies are essentially cowards surrounding themselves with support. When i was confronted by a bullying employee who disagreed with everything I would use my trick which was to say " I hear what you are saying but" Each time they challenged I repeated the phrase and never wavered. They soon got the message I was not for turning .