I Lost Myself

[Bimoz]

Since I have been with my partner I am not the person I used to be. I used to be happy, healthy and I had friends and I stayed in touch with my family. I just want to leave and I feel so trapped.

 

[Rocetuf]

I had been in a relationship before where I lost myself too. It happened when I was in college. I was so in love with this guy who was in the Marines. My best friends would tell me that I wasn't the same person with him.
I cried many of days and nights and all I could tell you is that there comes a point in each of our lives where we have to let go.
If this relationship is causing you more harm than good and it's safe for you to leave then please do.
Now if you fear for your safety please contact the Domestic Violence hot line for help.
Whatever you do please try to remember to take care of your needs first.

 

[Omij]

Try to tell yourself you deserve to be happy, and if he's not.... leave. If you can't right now... make a plan.

 

[Urib]

It's' good (and painful and disturbing I know) that you're recognizing this. There's a reason it feels so bad, and that's because it just isn't right for your health anymore. Some situations are toxic and they really do make us sick. The next step is to gather the strength and resources to do what you know you need to do. Let yourself cry, and be upset about. But ask yourself how both your own and your partner's actions have contributed to this deterioration of your health, this isolation from loved ones and other issues. The key is to eliminate all negative inputs, and since you only really have control of your own actions, this is something you'll need to do on your own.

If breaking up face-to-face is not a safe bet, then please get to a place where you can make arrangements with family and perhaps a domestic violence support liaison. You'll receive the help as well as the crucial advice needed to make a quiet getaway from an abusive household.

 

[Kever]

It's so hard when you know they're sick and the reason why they're acting how they are is because of it.

Nobody understands PTSD relationships.

 

[Bimoz]

Yeah but hitting, actually punching your own head. Swearing, throwing objects, comments that make you question if they're aimed at you or not. Not washing for years (seriously). Being overweight and not getting help from a gp or doing any exercise. Eating more junk all the time. And controlling my finances, keeping all the money. Then telling me I'm horrible for saying I want to split up?

Totally unacceptable.

It's fifteen years since the mom died.

I am not rotting away with this person. No way.

The thing that pisses me off most is my family aren't as bad as this.

Horrid temper. I should have left twelve years ago.

Twelve years wasted

f*ck

 

[Ika]

At that point in time, it's going past PTSD symptoms. It's controlling and abusive.