I have been hospitalized twice... both voluntary commitments. It's SO hard to check yourself into a mental hospital. Nobody wants to do it. But, I know that for me it totally saved my life. If you are feeling like you might need to be in a hospital, chances are you're right. It sounds like you have a real reason to feel very very low right now. Health professionals are there to HELP ... to DO NO HARM. Your PCP has definitely not followed that obligation. Not only does the hospital provide acute, stabilizing care, they also provide you with coping mechanisms to use when you leave the hospital. depending on where you go, it can be 3-10 days on average (in my state, in my personal experience). I highly encourage you to seek inpatient treatment so ensure your safety. I have been where you're at more than once. When I get that low I feel like I will NEVER be "up" again, and if i am ... inevitably something will come along and crush me yet again. However, when I'm in my right mind and thinking clearly - I am SO thankful I'm alive... despite all the pain I have suffered the good times are so worth it. And recovery is always possible. its NEVER too late to get help. If going to a hospital seems like too much to think about, please at least call a crisis line and get some immediate support of some kind. 1-800-273-8255 (National Suicide Prevention Hotline).
