I started my new job yesterday and worked again today. It was really busy yesterday and my body was really caned this morning. I had real trouble getting up and didn't think i'd make it. Massage is so ...it's such a physically demanding job. My lower back is really giving me trouble. I need to get going with core strength exercises again...now I can afford to.
I'm not going to talk about the events of the last two weeks again...I don't want to give it any more energy. I've taken action, and now I can just let it go and concentrate on my new reality.
My new workplace is really swish and the rooms are much more luxurious, with showers and it's clean and the boss is really lovely...at least she is at the moment. It's early days I guess. I know bosses are meant to be all the same. The last one was laid back, to the point of ditzy. This new one is relaxed, but I think she is smarter. She's not a ditz, but she is asian and has that little girl voice. I get along with her at the moment though, so who knows what the future holds?
I just gave my poor feet a much needed footspa and scrub, and they feel soooooooooooooo much better. Tomorrow I will have a long bath in the morning after I get up and everyone has gone to school and work. I'll have the bathroom all to myself. Looking forward to that. So, now that I'm back on my feet work wise, stuff has a chance to process more...and I was feeling pretty sad earlier. The grief is coming up again. I have space to grieve again, and don't have to appear cheerful.
I'm listening to Lou Reed and John Cales tribute album to Andy Warhol, and it's helping. One of my fave all time albums. I also had a friend load me up with really great music this week, which brought me back from the brink of total misery, to bliss again. Amazing the healing power of music. Things are looking up, and thanks once again to all who showed support in this thread. I'm so lucky to have people online and off who I can go to and tell my story and be believed.
The reality of the craziness that went down the other week has settled in, and it all seems like a leunig cartoon now...but so does life in general I find. The world is ruled by idiots and people in charge often have such poor judgement, or get so easily charmed by sociopathic bullies...and the good ones seem to always cop the blame for their bad behavior. It makes no sense...but that's people for you.
Anyone could see, if I were to be asked to stand next to the woman who attacked me, who would be more likely to be violent...and yet it has happened TWICE in two years, that a massively tough as nails bitch has smeared me or lied to make me look like the bad, violent one, when it was them. Both of them were supposedly "healers" Lightworkers in denial of their dark side, that end up wreaking havoc while they get to point the finger at everyone else. Hypocrites.
I've realized that this is what happens when people in the wellness industry place money above their own self care...they snap at some point and take it out on whoever is there...and I seem to make a nice easy target. I don't ever want to become like them...that's what they've taught me.
I'd love to know how to stop being a target for these sort of people.
