I Was Attacked At Work Yesterday.

[Philippa]

It was a totally unexpected thing, though I knew this woman I worked with seemed to have an issue with me, but I had no idea what the issue was or where it stemmed from, and she wasn't interested in letting me know either?

I raised an issue with her about why she was taking clients that were supposed to be given to the people who had not been getting many clients that day (i.e Me), she told me to f*ck off even though I was civil in my tone with her and speaking rationally. I had every right to ask her, but her reply was to tell me to f*ck off and dismissed it. When I said "can you not speak to me that way" she only arked up more, and it was reminiscent of another period in time where I had a very similar incident with a manager (who actually was the manager, unlike this woman who was a worker like me and who only thought she was the manager), and it turned into this ridiculous scene where she was yelling at me and telling me to get out of the place...and at one point she even slammed me up against the wall with her forearm and choked me, when no one was there to witness it, so I cannot even press charges, as she will say it was me, and deny it.

It was really scary.

After she was yelling at me for a while, and actually critiqued my poor skills of abuse??? Yes, you read that right...she actually dissed me on my lack of "top abusing skills"...to which I replied "That's a GOOD thing!" :D

I went a few doors down where the boss was at, and told her about it, and she did nothing...she didn't fire her, she just said she would put us both apart. She's a nice enough person, but she has no idea on how to be a boss, and will not embrace her authority for a manager...which is the problem in the first place. Because she will not step up and embrace her role as boss, and leaves it up to us to run things...it makes people like this woman think they can just take the reigns and pretend they are the boss and impose their non existent authority on the other workers, and also behave in very competitive and unfair ways. She's basically a bully, the woman who abused me.

I feel better today, and I spent the night with friends who gave me beer and weed and provided distractions so I could process the event without allowing it to take over my night and ruin my night. Today I feel better and went for a bike ride earlier in the sun, which was pleasant. I just thought I would acknowledge that it happened here, and am open to more support from lovely peeps here. I think I've nearly got it out of my system.

Thanks for reading.

 

[CrazyHorse]

My stars!!! What the hell Philippa! That is so extremely out of order, I am so sorry about that. What is going on at your work? You are right, that is an attack, both verbal and psycical. I cannot believe your boss did not react, they both should be fired. I am really sorry, I hope you are/will be okay? I think it is a very serious matter. I feel angry and shocked that she can do something like that and without no consequence. I think you handled yourself well under the circumstances.You are a very special and strong person. I wish I could do something.....

 

[Deleted member 19804]

Hi Philippa, I'm sorry this happened to you. I am glad though that you stood up for yourself and that you know she's the one in the wrong here. I kinda recognise the situation, too. One of my female colleagues seems to hate me too and is constantly trying to make everyone hate me and think that I'm not capable of doing my job. She hasn't attacked me (yet) but I believe it will get to a serious confrontation at some point.

The way I handle this is that I write down everything she does and save all even slightly important emails we send to each other, so that she will get caught if she tells lies about me. If she goes too far I will confront her and even talk to upper management if necessary.
I think you should go to the police. Your boss can confirm that you went straight to her and perhaps she has noticed other indicators of your coworker's agression.

Hope things will work out for you.

 

[Philippa]

Thanks.

Other women I work with there have also been saying that she has been stealing clients from them and taking jobs instead of giving them to the people whose turn it was or who had not had as many clients as she had. She's just basically really greedy and in denial about it.

She isn't a very self-aware person and is projecting a lot of her own behavior onto me and others there, and acting like she is trying to be fair when in fact she is being dodgy. She's manipulative and psychotic...a pretty dangerous combo.

Thanks for your responses here Crazyhorse and snowwhite. I appreciate the support. It's been crazy.

I stayed over at a friends house yesterday, and felt much better...but now I feel like it's unfair that I should have to have my income reduced because of this bitch? I'm going to speak to the boss again, and I'm thinking I will just quit after tomorrow because if she won't fire her for that kind of behavior, then there is something not right there.

I've just sent a text to the boss expressing how angry I feel and asking her what she intends to do about it besides seperating us, as most people would have fired her on the spot for that behavior. I asked her if she really wants someone like that representing her business, and pointed out that it reflects poorly on her. in the end.

I'm hoping that will have some influence on her. Why should I have to decrease my shifts and income so this bitch can work more days? She was there first, and she makes the boss money, but does she really want more outbreaks like that...because other women have also complained that she takes our clients for herself and is being extremely competitive and bitchy whilst trying to blame others for the same behavior.

I feel really angry as well...and I'm still in shock a bit too. I was riding my bike to a friends place last night after it happened, and it hit me, that this has been happening waaaaaaaaay too much to me lately. It was only a week ago that I got totally abused by the woman who I confronted about the night she helped me pick up my cat and was going on about feeling pressured the whole time. I had to block and delete her...and now this? I don't think I can take anymore.

 

[Philippa]

I just received word back that she has decided to fire us both because she cannot work out who was in the wrong the most! What a dipshit.

 

[CrazyHorse]

What!!!!!!

 

[Philippa]

Yes, you read right. The boss is just not very bright and it sounds like the other woman spun some story to confuse her and make it look like I was the one in the wrong. She is a nice person, but just a bit of a ditz.

 

[Philippa]

Because I grabbed her hand first when she was getting in my face, it would appear that I was the one who was attacking her...which is what she wanted it to look like. I've had it done before to me...by another woman. They try and make it look like they are going to hit you and then when you react in a defensive way they act like you were the one attacking them, and then "defend" themselves by attacking you...which is what she did. Because there were no witnesses when she slammed me against the wall, no one really knows except me and her...and she has spun it to make it look like I'm the evil one.

 

[Deleted member 19804]

What the... That is just illogical, not to mention unfair! It should be encouraged that employees who are bullied and/or harassed by coworkers go to their employer. She cannot punish you for following protocol. You could've hit, pushed or kicked her and you didn't. You came to her and told her what happened. If she is too lazy to at least investigate this, then she's the one who should be fired.

Are you a member of a labour union? Or can you go above her head?

Injustices like this really make me angry. I hope this situation will be corrected very soon.

 

[Philippa]

Thanks, but I hadn't even signed a contract at that stage, as I'd only been there a couple of weeks and she just hadn't gotten around to doing the legalities, so I'm not covered to take it further legally...unfortunately. I asked her when we could organise the contract signing as I was a little nervous about it, having experienced similar treatment a year ago with another woman who had not organized my paperwork very well and I was left without a leg to stand on. I was wanting to get all that sorted but she kept putting it off, so now I am not eligible for union help as I technically wasn't there.

When I sent the original text to the boss to tell her this person was not playing fair with the clients and taking more than she should, she replied telling me to sort it out between the two of us and not involve her!! What kind of boss doesn't want to know about that sort of stuff...especially when she had just written out a bunch of rules the day before to make sure we all got a fair amount of work between us?

I'm baffled. I knew she was ditzy but this is just...she has no idea how to embrace her role as a boss and manager. She wanted to be 'friends' with us all, but in the workplace this is a clear example of how being friends with your staff can lead to trouble.

 

[Philippa]

I am happy the other woman got fired though. I was going to leave anyway, but she really really loved it there and thought she was top dog. I know she's gotta be feeling pretty pissed right now...and I couldn't be happier about that. :D

 

[JustBe]

As hard and unfair as this all is right now, I think you're well rid of that poisonous workplace environment.