Update On Our Relationship
My relationship with my daughter, in the past has been rocky, anxiety provoking, walking on eggshells, and over all not so great. We have actually in the past 20yrs spent more time apart that we have together, with long periods of estrangement.......This last one lasted almost exactly to the staring date of the beginning of years 7...
Since August 8th, we have reunited, because as Anthony suggested to me 2 years ago, that I need to step up the the plate, be the adult, be the mother and contact her. Just takes me a lot longer to do things, than most people. I do want to personally, and publicly thank Anthony, for his straight talk, no bullshit attitude. I have never forgotten his words, as they have always been in the back of my mind.....
I wanted to give an update, on our relationship, and possibly offer some hope for those that may be estranged from family, or loved ones. Someone really does need to take the first step, but I also believe that the timing, circumstances, and personal growth has to happen, before a positive outcome can be reached.....
First of all, my daughter has grown so much, become so aware of others and their problems, become so much more relaxed, confident, and in tune with herself and her own personal growth. I am so proud of the personal accomplishments that she has made, and the effort that she has put forth to get there. I know that looking at oneself is never easy, and harder still to implement the changes needed to grow.....
We still have issues, or should I say I do. I still haven't let my guard down completely I still wait for the other shoe to drop, and there are things that still cause me great anxiety. But, the wonderful part is....I can talk to her about these issues, and she actually tries to talk me down from the anxiety, helps me to understand that things really have changed, and talks to me about her strides to overcome her issues. All of this helps. We have a WAY more open and honest relationship than before. We also spend some quality time together at the gym on Sundays, after she cooks an amazing dinner....That is an added bonus!!! We also try to do a mom and daughter Monday, once a month.....
My SIL....What can I say..........As a child growing up, I thought he was destine for nothing. He was hard around the edges, had a chip on his shoulder bigger than mine, and had an air of arrogance.....
Today...OMG......I love him to death. He owns his own business, he is a contractor, a carpenter, works hard, is a great provider, and good dad, and a great husband....I couldn't have asked for a better SIL..... I have 2 great grand kids, that I love to death. Although, it would be nice to spend more time with Steven, but @ almost 19, a girlfriend, and PT job,he also works with his dad, to pay off his cell phone bill and car insurance that they pay for him, but he must repay...... I guess I will take what ever time I can get......
All in all, this is the best thing that has happened to me in a long time, and even though, at times it can still be a bit of a struggle for me,(and I am sure as well for my daughter) it is a success, and I am so grateful!!!!!!
There is hope out there so never give up on your dreams......
