If I Kill Will It Go Away?

[Cryptantha]

I'm going to agree with everyone here. Revenge doesn't help, only hurts worse. If you can, channel that rage and frustration into something positive. For me it's exercise or cleaning to work off that excess. If that doesn't work, maybe hitting a pillow, shouting into it, writing letters to your abuser, then ripping it up. You've lived through so much more than most people. You're stronger than you realize. May you find a peaceful moment.

 

[MariaTPhD]

I'm sorry if this post seems a bit all over the place..

I'm deep in thought at the moment. Every day I...

Emmie, you are simply looking for catharsis. Catharsis is that release and relief a person feels after an action. It is based on the neurotransmitters oxytocin and serotonin which are released when a person exercises, eats, has sex, sings or laughs. You do not need to go to prison (although if you think you might hurt someone or yourself, you need to tell your therapist this!) You need to talk more about the rage (especially if you are processing the trauma) that is being pushed down. A calm, gentle type of person is MORE likely to feel this way when they start to heal. The rage you feel is an indication of the process of healing in which you are in.

My mentor in psychology once said, "That which gets suppressed, will eventually get expressed." Find a therapist if you don't already have one. If you do, talk about this more, not less. Write about it in a journal. The more you talk or write about it, the more catharsis you will feel and the less you will feel an urge to hurt others. Killing won't make it go away. Bandura did a lot of research on this. It actually aggravates it. Talking about it (called talk therapy) and trying to find meaning in the experience can help a lot.

God bless your healing.

 

[Weemie]

Keep talking it out. We who are without power often feel desperate, for some small sliver of the upper hand. Killing is like stepping on butterflies. It's messing with the space-time continuum. It's altering trajectories and realities. Sometimes, the best thing we can start with is personal power. Power over ourselves, full ownership of our own thoughts and feelings. Some people call that confidence. I call it survival.

 

[katz]

I'm sorry if this post seems a bit all over the place..

I'm deep in thought at the moment. Every day I...

Emmie420,
I know that what helps me when I feel that kind of anger is to go and throw rocks out into a lake or ocean. Throw as hard and as far as you can. Then, also yell if you want to. You can say anything you want--just get it out of you. It is toxic and can only hurt you. You don't need to be hurt any more.

 

[Deleted member 34424]

It doesn't do anything but make things worse. Don't believe what TV shows and movies say (since there's a lot of revenge movies and everything seems to be hunky dory afterwards- not the case).