Hi all,
I'm a new to this forum. And I'm sorry for my English(English is not my native language) but I need your help.
Let me explain what I've been through shortly.
I've been a very happy and friendly guy before the October 27, 2008. I've been in the middle way back to my home and in the train I was attacked by some gang. Later I woke up in the railway road. It was terrible night I ever had. First of all I didn't know where am I, but very quickly my memory came back to me. I was bleeding badly and I had my arms broken and my head was like a pumpkin big. It was dark and only railroad and the forest around me. Suddenly, I've heard peoples voices and the lights it looks like those people were looking for someone. And I've realized that they were looking for me (because I've just only one on there). Than I tried to escape from them. I was looking for some kind of shelter somewhere. Fortunately, there was a village near. But when I went into this village some people try to catch me (and screaming "Catch him") I was shocked then, how it possible and what was happening.
After that I was trying to escape from them I was desperately running out and than I fell to the water (it was kind of a lake not very big). I'm used to be a professional swimmer in my earlies. In the center of this lake there were a lot of plants and some small pieces of the land in which I tried to hide from my persecutors(but had know idea who they were).
Very quickly all those people who tried to catch me found that I was in the center of the lake. And I've seen and heard them circling around the lake with lights, but no one would like to come into the lake(the water was very cold but I feel nothing but deep fear). I've spent about 3-4 hours in this water trying to survive. I even tried to stop breathing when I thought this is the end(but fortunately I couldn't do it).
After that I tried to communicate with them I was screaming to them "what they want from me, and I have no money with me and that all my baggage was in train, and I was asking them to leave me alone because I even don't know them". And when sun were start raising they were all gone. I've seen them going out (to be honest I didn't believe it). After that I swam to coast and I run out through some farm fields, later I was crawling thought some fields as well. Until at last I came across some private lake where were 3 or 4 big dogs. A guardian of this lake asked me who I am and I explained him all my story so far (I think he didn't believe me because I've looked awful, my clothes were dirty and jagged, my head was like I had beaten I looked like a homeless person I think). But this man help me and gave me some food an proposed to stayed on they lake for some nights, and of course I stayed with them.
But later on the same day came an owner of the lake he asked me all over again my story (I told him everything again). When I asked them could I use their mobile phones they told me that it's expensive to call to my home town (which I didn't understand). But they got from me my parents address and phone number (the owner of the lake told me that they would contact with my parents when he game back to home).
To be honest I was worry about that they could know the people from I tried to escape (because they live in the same village). I spent one night (it was a terrible night I was frightening about what happed to me).
The next evening we heard that some cars came to the lake. It was the happiest day in all my life, it was my father with my friends( I think that GOD helped me). Later on the way home in the car with my father he told me that the owner of the Lake just call to my father when they arrived to this village (I don't know why he didn't called before.). We've been back to my home the next day. I was too tired to think about anything happened to me I've just fall a sleep.
Later when I was safe at home I had many nightmares (which was very real and very close to what I was went through). I felt fear, anxiety, helplessness and it was horrible day by day. My parents try to help me as possible as they could. But my fear was much more powerful. I became a very hypervigilant person that I wouldn't before (I think that some one or group try to follow me to harm or kill. Even I understand that's only my past memory that scares me, I'm still feel enormous fear when I'm going out of home). Because of that I'm mostly spending time at home (of course I'm going out some time, but it's really difficult for me)
It's been more than 2 years now. I've read many books about PTSD, I even decide going to the psychiatrist to ask for help, but I'm not sure that it will help.
Please if some one could help me I would be happy on your advise.
Thank you very much for you help.
I'm a new to this forum. And I'm sorry for my English(English is not my native language) but I need your help.
Let me explain what I've been through shortly.
I've been a very happy and friendly guy before the October 27, 2008. I've been in the middle way back to my home and in the train I was attacked by some gang. Later I woke up in the railway road. It was terrible night I ever had. First of all I didn't know where am I, but very quickly my memory came back to me. I was bleeding badly and I had my arms broken and my head was like a pumpkin big. It was dark and only railroad and the forest around me. Suddenly, I've heard peoples voices and the lights it looks like those people were looking for someone. And I've realized that they were looking for me (because I've just only one on there). Than I tried to escape from them. I was looking for some kind of shelter somewhere. Fortunately, there was a village near. But when I went into this village some people try to catch me (and screaming "Catch him") I was shocked then, how it possible and what was happening.
After that I was trying to escape from them I was desperately running out and than I fell to the water (it was kind of a lake not very big). I'm used to be a professional swimmer in my earlies. In the center of this lake there were a lot of plants and some small pieces of the land in which I tried to hide from my persecutors(but had know idea who they were).
Very quickly all those people who tried to catch me found that I was in the center of the lake. And I've seen and heard them circling around the lake with lights, but no one would like to come into the lake(the water was very cold but I feel nothing but deep fear). I've spent about 3-4 hours in this water trying to survive. I even tried to stop breathing when I thought this is the end(but fortunately I couldn't do it).
After that I tried to communicate with them I was screaming to them "what they want from me, and I have no money with me and that all my baggage was in train, and I was asking them to leave me alone because I even don't know them". And when sun were start raising they were all gone. I've seen them going out (to be honest I didn't believe it). After that I swam to coast and I run out through some farm fields, later I was crawling thought some fields as well. Until at last I came across some private lake where were 3 or 4 big dogs. A guardian of this lake asked me who I am and I explained him all my story so far (I think he didn't believe me because I've looked awful, my clothes were dirty and jagged, my head was like I had beaten I looked like a homeless person I think). But this man help me and gave me some food an proposed to stayed on they lake for some nights, and of course I stayed with them.
But later on the same day came an owner of the lake he asked me all over again my story (I told him everything again). When I asked them could I use their mobile phones they told me that it's expensive to call to my home town (which I didn't understand). But they got from me my parents address and phone number (the owner of the lake told me that they would contact with my parents when he game back to home).
To be honest I was worry about that they could know the people from I tried to escape (because they live in the same village). I spent one night (it was a terrible night I was frightening about what happed to me).
The next evening we heard that some cars came to the lake. It was the happiest day in all my life, it was my father with my friends( I think that GOD helped me). Later on the way home in the car with my father he told me that the owner of the Lake just call to my father when they arrived to this village (I don't know why he didn't called before.). We've been back to my home the next day. I was too tired to think about anything happened to me I've just fall a sleep.
Later when I was safe at home I had many nightmares (which was very real and very close to what I was went through). I felt fear, anxiety, helplessness and it was horrible day by day. My parents try to help me as possible as they could. But my fear was much more powerful. I became a very hypervigilant person that I wouldn't before (I think that some one or group try to follow me to harm or kill. Even I understand that's only my past memory that scares me, I'm still feel enormous fear when I'm going out of home). Because of that I'm mostly spending time at home (of course I'm going out some time, but it's really difficult for me)
It's been more than 2 years now. I've read many books about PTSD, I even decide going to the psychiatrist to ask for help, but I'm not sure that it will help.
Please if some one could help me I would be happy on your advise.
Thank you very much for you help.
