Internet Dating For Ptsd Dummies

[Gloria]

I think if women stopped arguing with one another, they would already be running the world..

Absolutely true. In the corporate world women would stab each other in the back more than men. Most women feel too competitive to mentor. Oh God! At horse stables, there are 95% women owning horses and the cat fights and competitition was unbelievable. Even at the gym, women fight over lockers! Totally agree plus women (read a book called 'Brain Sex' - nothing to go about sex but how different the male and female brains are) Men are genetically engineered to lead. However, our genes are evolving!! :O_o:

 

[Gloria]

Most addicts are very selfish people that only think of themselves and using others to feed their addiction, ego etc.

I was married to an alcoholic and it was always clear who came first. An alcoholic will let his family go without food but he will never go without his drug. I've heard of addicts that sold their daughters for sex to get a fix. Sad. It is all part of what we are looking for when we go on the internet. How many profiles say "drink socially" and what they really mean is that they are the bar every night???:eek:

 

[Gloria]

There are a lot of women who are abusing men..

I can't tell you how many times I went to dinner with a couple and the woman brought up the size of the husband's penis or his performance in bed. I'm sure men on this forum have met a few abusive women. Men get caught because of black and blue marks and broken bones but a woman can't be taken to jail for verbal abuse.

 

[Sandra]

I was married to an alcoholic and it was always clear who came first. An alcoholic will let his family go without food but he will never go without his drug. I've heard of addicts that sold their daughters for sex to get a fix.

So sad and so true Gloria.

 

[Sandra]

It is all part of what we are looking for when we go on the internet. How many profiles say "drink socially" and what they really mean is that they are the bar every night???:eek:

That's what you call denial.

 

[Loloma]

Doesn't that piss... you off when your just written a post and LOST IT!!!!

Never mind, I've been on one internet date a few months after I shifted here. The guy seemed ok, had a few chats with him on the internet and we arranged to meet and have coffee. He was an older version of his photo (surprise, surprise). Started alright, he told me more about his life in the army and the places he'd been. Would you like to go for a drive he said. it was a nice day, so against my better judgement I agreed.

The drive was going fine for a while, until he pulled up and stopped. He grabbed me and put his tongue down my throat. YYUUUUUKKKKK...:mad::p:oops:. He then told me that he loved me :inlove: and would I come and live with him. (ARE YOU NUTS, OR WHAT). I don't even bloody know you. Proceeded to tell me that we're getting older and don't have anytime to waste, and we can do away with all the courting stuff!

He knew I was living in a holiday home, and said I needed somewhere to live anyway. By that time I was really SCARED and the tears came, buckets of tears. I asked him to drive me back to my car which he did (thank goodness). I jumped in the car and took off home still crying. Once inside I locked the door and stood there shaking. What an idiot I'd been, never done it again since. Much too frightened.

 

[Sandra]

That even happens with people who don't meet from the net Loloma.

And yes one has to be so careful now a days.

I'm glad you are ok.

 

[ifonly]

I tried online dating as a social experiment. In the first profile, I used one of my better photos & faked the content to see what would happen. I wrote that I was an "easy going, uncomplicated/simple fun gal with a good sense of humour who loved cooking & wanted kids." (nothing is further from the truth)
Woah, I was bombarded with replies from men. I didn't write to any of them, but kept track how many read my profile & how many wrote. If I really were that made-up person, I might have been quite chuffed. There were over 400 hits on my profile and about 50 emails in 14 days.

Then I deleted that profile. I put a 2nd one up that was honest to god me. I used a profile pic that was more like the current me (not the older prettier one), put my real age and was blunt in the content about who I was.

How many men wrote? None! (I wasn't surprised)
How many hits on my profile in 2wks? Oh about 10.

I wasn't sad or upset. I didn't know what kind of man used online dating sites and I wanted to test drive it to kinda get a feel for the majority of male subscribers. It was a revelation that so many of them wanted to be with someone "simple" & fun who could cook and wanted to be a mum.

It was an eye opening experience!

 

[Sandra]

Sure sounds like it Ifonly.

And I wonder what those men were really like. Also probably not as they descibed.

 

[Loloma]

Ifonly,

I really liked that, you can see how superficial people are, both men and women. Makes me laugh some people search criteria. So many WANTS, stipulations, demands. Long hair, short hair, blonde, dark, good figure, good looking etc. and they wonder why they're still alone.

The only ones worth looking at are those who are flexible and willing to take it one step at a time. Still not a good idea though if you have a lot of issues to sort through with PTSD. Could be a recipe for disaster.

 

[Sandra]

That is sure is so true Loloma.

 

[ifonly]

Oh hey. Imagine if there was an internet dating site exclusively for PTSD people?!! :p