I am going to call myself Yoda because of his infinite wisdom.
So I am Yoda, a girl in her late teens and a sufferer of PTSD. I am really grateful to have found this site. It just feels relieving to be reminded that while, yes it is unfortunate PTSD has impacted our lives, there are people who can empathize with me.
PTSD showed obvious symptoms for me when I was 14— vivid nightmares of people hurting me, flashbacks where I lose all sense of reality and relive traumatic experiences, and lots of anxiety.
(I am not sure how the rules work here, so I'm going to be considerate and not talk about the traumatic experiences I've had here as it may trigger people.)
Following a traumatic event at the end of middle school, old traumas that I had blocked out of my head resurfaced and I became depressed. Over a two year period it escalated to suicidal thoughts that were so strong, and I couldn't take it anymore and acted upon it. I was able to go to the ER though with my small will to live, and after that I went through residential treatment.
The therapy really helped me and I gained the coping skills to handle hard times. However, the residential treatment center (RTC) never diagnosed me with PTSD. It frustrates me to this day because it took such a toll on me, and it was so obvious based on my experiences and then the symptoms I was having that I had PTSD.
The year after I left treatment, I went through more traumas. Uncontrollable things and I wondered why me. I still wonder that sometimes. Finally, as a junior in high school I received a diagnosis that was already evident. But the diagnosis enabled me to finally be medicated properly for the symptoms I was experiencing, which helped a bit.
I am proud to say that I worked through my traumas in countless hours of therapy.
This past December I experienced two traumas and again I just questioned why me. First I was struck by a car while biking, and then another trauma. Before these, however, with absolutely no trigger, my depression (major depressive disorder) came about. While in treatment I was never medicated other than ADHD medications. So I have now my psychiatrist is trying to find the right medication combo for me- as my body is allergic to SSRIs and a lot of medications, it is a grueling process because, yay another diagnosis (sarcasm), I have chronic suicidal ideation. Which really sucks because I have so many good things in my life that became clear to me through the therapy I did when I went through treatment (and therefore part of me wants to live), yet part of me no longer wants to live.
I'll stop talking now because introductions are not my forte, as I tend to rant/struggle with sticking to the point.
My hope is to gain more insights into my PTSD and coping mechanisms, support, and support others.
Thank you!
So I am Yoda, a girl in her late teens and a sufferer of PTSD. I am really grateful to have found this site. It just feels relieving to be reminded that while, yes it is unfortunate PTSD has impacted our lives, there are people who can empathize with me.
PTSD showed obvious symptoms for me when I was 14— vivid nightmares of people hurting me, flashbacks where I lose all sense of reality and relive traumatic experiences, and lots of anxiety.
(I am not sure how the rules work here, so I'm going to be considerate and not talk about the traumatic experiences I've had here as it may trigger people.)
Following a traumatic event at the end of middle school, old traumas that I had blocked out of my head resurfaced and I became depressed. Over a two year period it escalated to suicidal thoughts that were so strong, and I couldn't take it anymore and acted upon it. I was able to go to the ER though with my small will to live, and after that I went through residential treatment.
The therapy really helped me and I gained the coping skills to handle hard times. However, the residential treatment center (RTC) never diagnosed me with PTSD. It frustrates me to this day because it took such a toll on me, and it was so obvious based on my experiences and then the symptoms I was having that I had PTSD.
The year after I left treatment, I went through more traumas. Uncontrollable things and I wondered why me. I still wonder that sometimes. Finally, as a junior in high school I received a diagnosis that was already evident. But the diagnosis enabled me to finally be medicated properly for the symptoms I was experiencing, which helped a bit.
I am proud to say that I worked through my traumas in countless hours of therapy.
This past December I experienced two traumas and again I just questioned why me. First I was struck by a car while biking, and then another trauma. Before these, however, with absolutely no trigger, my depression (major depressive disorder) came about. While in treatment I was never medicated other than ADHD medications. So I have now my psychiatrist is trying to find the right medication combo for me- as my body is allergic to SSRIs and a lot of medications, it is a grueling process because, yay another diagnosis (sarcasm), I have chronic suicidal ideation. Which really sucks because I have so many good things in my life that became clear to me through the therapy I did when I went through treatment (and therefore part of me wants to live), yet part of me no longer wants to live.
I'll stop talking now because introductions are not my forte, as I tend to rant/struggle with sticking to the point.
My hope is to gain more insights into my PTSD and coping mechanisms, support, and support others.
Thank you!
