It's Starting!"

[Tiger]

Finally the counselling starts this tuesday, but I am so terrified about it!! I have also just managed nearly 2 months without S/H, but it is getting increasingly difficult as time goes by!! Sometimes Iam positive that I would feel so much better if I just did it and I also am running out of reasons not to do it!! I am very concerned about what lies ahead with regards to the therapy!! I know i have to do it!! I know I need to do it!! I worry about the emotions, thoughts and memories I am going to be going through and without my usual way of dealing with it all as well!! Tonight is one of those nights that I am trying absolutely anything to destract myself from these S/H urges!!

 

[TXbandit]

Hang in there, Tiger. You can do this! :hug: Keep staying positive

 

[WillyKat]

Remember that you are doing the right thing, the courageous thing, and the thing that shows you care about yourself.

You're embarking on an adventure, one where you won't be alone anymore, where you'll be conferring with a guide, while at the same time travelling with hundreds of others here on this forum.

Your T will be there when it becomes frightening; so will we.

Remember to breathe, ten times deep, then ten more. Notice everything around you and name them. Notice that its March 1 of 2015. It's no other place, no other time, but now.

 

[Dana1010]

I don't think there's anything to fear. Your therapist will pace you--he/she is not just going to drill into the worst trauma right off the bat. As for the emotions, it always feels better to relate them to someone else--holding them in is what hurts. I always feel cleansed and somewhat released from the traumas after I've talked to someone else about them.

Best to you.

 

[Tiger]

Thankyou!! I appreciate that alot!!

 

[still_i_rise]

You deserve to get help. You deserve to have support.
You are take a huge, brave step reaching out. Good for you!!
:tup:

 

[bluebird]

I am so glad to hear that you are getting the help you deserve, dear Tiger :hug: I understand it might be very confusing for you... I wish you good luck with all that! Keep in mind we all will be glad to offer our support, whenever you wish to share your emotions with us... I am very proud of you for having made such an important step in your journey towards healing. Take excelent care :hug:

 

[Tiger]

I have been so afraid about the therapy and I have shed so many tears leading up to today!! I did it, I have emotionally shut down now!! I feel nothing!! This is usually when I S/H and I am trying so hard to avoid that. It seems almost impossible for me to cope with all of the nasty memories and emotions without S/H because that is what I have done since I was 17 and I'm now 35!! Am I taking on too much? Am I setting myself up for a massive failure? Is this even possible? Can I do this? Lastly, is it supposed to be so terrifying?

 

[Dana1010]

Sounds like the therapist may have dug too deep too soon. Let them know you are in a fragile state and that they should go easy at first.

 

[WillyKat]

You need to communicate all these feelings to your therapist. And yes, maybe its too fast. In any case, communication is imperative.

 

[bluebird]

Dear Tiger, I agree with others - perhaps it would be a good idea to contact your therapist and let her know about the things you are feelings.

I remember that I cried a lot after my first session... It is natural to feel overwhelmed, and it certainly does not mean you did something wrong. Quite the opposite - you have just made an important step! Be kind to yourself. Try to go for a walk, enjoy the sun and breeze... How about a ZOO? Animals can ease your mind. Or a botanic garden... Try to be in a pleasant environment.

I hope you will soon feel better. Sending many hugs to you :hug:.

 

[Tiger]

I am still having times where I feel very overwhelmed and am overcome with painful tears that appear in any situation I may find myself in!! Something, anything will trigger them and it is difficult to choke them back every time!! Even standing in queue in the shop!!! I don't fully understand what is happening to me and it is scary!! I have not S/H but feel that it may relieve some of this, I don't know!! I am in pain, but not physical and I don't normally allow myself to feel these emotions!! I know why now!!!