Sexual Assault Just Wondering What The Difference Is

[Angus]

I just say assaulted. I am not there yet though to say the other terms. They make me feel dirty, understandably. I think for anyone, use whatever term you are comfortable with at the time. Your the one in control and if you choose a "lighter term" (is there even one for it?!?) that is for you, not anyone else to judge.

 

[Friday]

I use comedy as distancing-language, more often than not. Mostly because I really dislike lying, and that's what calling one thing something else it isn't feels like to me. Comedy, otoh, skirts that boundary for me... Because, like saying I've got a million things to do to day... It's clearly not meant to be taken seriously. Also, I figure, if it sucked so much I've choosing to distance myself from it? I might as well get a laugh out of it. Even if I'm the only one who finds it funny ;)

Like others have said, however... Using any kind of distancing language at all? Is like a flashing neon sign for "This has f*cked me up & Im not okay, yet."

So when I catch myself using distancing language? (Or someone in the know, like a pro/ someone else who's walked in my shoes/ etc., catches me at it?) I take note. Work to be done there, if I didn't know it, already.

 

[Lucycat]

Further to this discussion, I hate the word 'incest'. I always believed that to be consensual sexual activity between close relatives. I learned more recently that - in the UK at least- it is any sexual activity between close relatives - wanted or not. In that context as I was sexually abused by my own father it was legally considered incest, although it did not go so far to be rape. That shocked me and I shy away from the term, just as those of you who were raped hate that word.

 

[RussH]

Incest is considered any sexual contact between family members, whether consensual or not.

 

[snarfus]

Until this word places shame upon the perps and those that perpetuate silence, I believe, as a victim, I should "shout" it at the top of my lungs. This commitment to discomfort is a benefit of my PTSD, I no longer risk a fall from grace. So, F that. Bring it. RAPE RAPE RAPE.

Every fiber of my being cried out in a singular chorus of “YES!” when I read this.

Until victim blaming, shaming, silencing, and otherwise ends, until those traumatized are met where they are, accepted, and heard, until the chains of shame-as-a-weapon are broken, shout it, shout from the rooftop, shout so every ear, heart, and mind is filled with your voice.