Listening to the CPTSD Critic

[ags1]

I have been struggling with my internal critic lately. I made two big discoveries (or rediscoveries) this year. Firstly, I realized I am intersex. Secondly, I suffered a brain injury as a newborn.

But my critic has been working overtime to undermine this. I have had a demeaning doubt loop playing non-stop in my head. Mental argument is useless, the critic always wins. And the statements of the critic feel so true and undeniable, while my other thoughts seem fanciful and deluded.

Today I tried a new technique. Instead of running from the critic, or pleading with it, I wrote down its arguments uncensored. You know what? When I write it out, the critic is just parroting fat-free emotive statements!

It definitely helps, but the effect so far is temporary. I hope repetition of the exercise will lead to more permanent improvements.

 

[arfie]

kudos ags. i have used a similar technique and it works well for me. it doesn't sew the critics mouth shut like i wish it would, but it calms the argument far enough to give me some peace. the more i use it, the more effective the exercise gets.

for what it's worth
lately i have been finding myself feeling almost friendly with my inner critic. sometimes it has valid points. i am beginning to wonder if i should train it rather than cure it.