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Little Surprises From Dissociation

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sun seeker

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Usually, I claim I don't dissociate enough to have blackouts or forget what I've done. But there is the occasional time I find something that's hard to explain any other way, even by bad memory. Usually I'll try to find some plausible explanation, however unlikely. But there are times...

To say I had a rough night last night is the understatement of the year. I managed to get a few hours' sleep after an intensely emotional flashback and getting some awesome support here and elsewhere with processing it into the small hours of the morning. There was a brief flash of a dream about getting a message asking if I was dissociating. This morning I woke up feeling like I'd been run over by an 18 wheeler.

I heat my house with wood, and it's still cold enough to need a fire at least at night. I have to go out for the afternoon and since I had used up all the wood I had inside and wanted to have some ready for when I get home, I dragged myself out of bed this morning and out to the woodshed to chop some, understandably not looking forward to the task. Lo and behold, there was a large pile of wood already chopped.

I stood there scratching my head. If I'd already chopped the wood, I would have brought it in. Except I didn't. Unless a good wood chopping fairy came over during the night, I did this and forgot all about it. I can't see why I would have but boy was it welcome.

Anyone else have stories about pleasant surprises you've given yourself by blacking out what you've done?
 
Apparently your brain knew what was going on with that email dream! What a nice surprise with the wood. Part of me is liking that wood chopping fairy idea, but probably not. Hooray for chopped wood, right? That's like waking up to breakfast in bed.

Sorry again you had to go through that. I hadn't been able to sleep hardly at all the past few days, mind going, panic, bleh. I can relate there...
Hope you're doing alright now. <3
 
Yes. I don't even question it anymore. I think I have laundry to fold, I go to my room to find the basket empty and the clothes already folded and put away. I do not recall having done it, but no one else is home, and I washed it the evening prior. My husband will gently tell me that I already did something that I'm frantically preparing myself for... I think this is just a normal part of having PTSD. Nowadays I use humor and laugh at myself, where before I would beat myself up for not knowing what I did. It's okay that I got chores done without even realizing it. LOL.
 
Sorry you had to go through that. I have had this but on a much smaller scale...want to do something but discovering I've done it already and don't remember doing it...so mine might fall into the "normal things humans do" category...It's both pleasant and a little unsettling (as in, what else might I do without realizing it...leave the stove on? Etc.). Justa suggestion, maybe try to keep a log of this if/when it happens again and maybe discuss it with your T? Just in case...
 
I can't say that I recall any "pleasant" surprises... except driving about 11 miles on a coastal highway and arriving at my city line without incident and 100% no recollection about how I got there. Last thing I remembered I was in an out of town Walmart parking lot. Mostly it just makes me confused. Sometimes it's a partial cuz "I" am "next to/walking beside myself.
 
Hmmm I don't think it's worked to my benefit much tbh. Usually it amounts in me getting off the bus too early or too late, then finding I have a few miles to walk as a result. I may have done a fair bit of extra laundry in my time like @Lewa too though things get misplaced which sets off the ocd in me to get reorganising lol
 
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