deeplyloved
MyPTSD Pro
I texted my therapist on Tuesday and asked for another session and told her why. I need to use my regular session this week just to prepare for an event this weekend. She replied that was a good idea and we would talk about that during our session as I wished. But then she didn't say anything about my request for an additional session. She didn't even respond. Maybe I just need psycho analysis--the blank slate method? I can't deal with dealing with my relationship with my therapist and my feelings of abandonment and hurt.
I feel so stupid. I have too many things to get done. Why did I even bother with starting this process up again. I feel like I need to harden my heart and stop trusting anyone with all this junk from the past. I just need to figure out how to shut it off.
Iwant to cancel my appointment for tomorrow so badly. I cancelled my Better Help account. She was so cold and answered only every couple of days with 1-2 sentences. She cancelled our last chat session and then had no other convenient times available. What's the point? I was paying too much $ for nothing, even with the financial assistance they offered. I feel like I should quit with my regular therapist too. Clearly my expectations are distorted.
I tried being vulnerable and asking for what I need and I just can't keep reaching out anymore. It hurts too much. I really don't know what to do. I can't talk to her about this stuff again, let alone about actual painful events. Why don't I matter enough to acknowledge my request and even just say "sorry, no. I don't have room for an extra session this week." Why ignore it? And why do I care about this situation so much. I feel pathetic and stupid for even caring about this. Why am I allowing this to hurt me?
To clarify, I started a Betterhelp account to try to avoid being too dependent on my trauma T outside of therapy. Clearly I am too much of a burden.
I feel so stupid. I have too many things to get done. Why did I even bother with starting this process up again. I feel like I need to harden my heart and stop trusting anyone with all this junk from the past. I just need to figure out how to shut it off.
Iwant to cancel my appointment for tomorrow so badly. I cancelled my Better Help account. She was so cold and answered only every couple of days with 1-2 sentences. She cancelled our last chat session and then had no other convenient times available. What's the point? I was paying too much $ for nothing, even with the financial assistance they offered. I feel like I should quit with my regular therapist too. Clearly my expectations are distorted.
I tried being vulnerable and asking for what I need and I just can't keep reaching out anymore. It hurts too much. I really don't know what to do. I can't talk to her about this stuff again, let alone about actual painful events. Why don't I matter enough to acknowledge my request and even just say "sorry, no. I don't have room for an extra session this week." Why ignore it? And why do I care about this situation so much. I feel pathetic and stupid for even caring about this. Why am I allowing this to hurt me?
To clarify, I started a Betterhelp account to try to avoid being too dependent on my trauma T outside of therapy. Clearly I am too much of a burden.
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