Moved back to old town & have regressed

[Hush92]

I have been in a really bad state for the past couple months. I left this forum a while back because I really felt like I had healed and conquered ptsd. But then I learned we would be moving back to my old hometown where I had many traumatic and painful experiences. I started getting nightmares again and other breakthrough symptoms, and now that I am back here it is very, very difficult. At first I was extremely depressed, suffering under unbearable amounts of anxiety and suicidal. I'm on a medication now that is really helping with my anxiety but I'm still a mess emotionally.

I've been having nightmares and flashbacks. The memories are aggravating both my depression and my psychosis. I'm not sure what to do about this, this is a big regression for me and it is a great disappointment because I really thought I had overcome my past. I feel living here is toxic for me and things will continue to be bad until I can become financially independent and move away, which won't be for another 2 years minimum. Does anyone have any experience with this? What helped? I'm really struggling.

 

[Deleted member 541]

One of the issues is this.... it's not the place where you live, it's within you. You probably had done a lot of work and got to a point where you could function well, and then moving back triggered things that you hadn't resolved. So, it's back to therapy, working hard at trying to figure things out, tearing shit apart piece by piece and working through everything again.

PTSD! The gift that keeps on giving!!!!,

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I left this forum a while back because I really felt like I had healed and conquered ptsd. But then I learned we would be moving back to my old hometown where I had many traumatic and painful experiences. I started getting nightmares again and other breakthrough symptoms, and now that I am back here it is very, very difficult. At first I was extremely depressed, suffering under unbearable amounts of anxiety and suicidal. I'm on a medication now that is really helping with my anxiety but I'm still a mess emotionally.

I was in a similar situation as far as having no PTSD symptoms for a long stretch of time and felt really good about it. Enter severe stressful situaions six month ago and all of my symptoms came back during all of the stress! It was really hard for me to manage these out of control feelings and thoughts that go along with suffering so much as opposed to being able to manage so well.

I have had the stresses lifted for the most part, yet my body is still carrying residual stresses which are now coming out in somatic ways. My immune system was unable to cope with the ongoing stress and my body began to break down and I was not prepared for that at all.

If I had to move back into a small town where I suffered so much mental harms and stresses would do me in entirely.

then moving back triggered things that you hadn't resolved. So, it's back to therapy, working hard at trying to figure things out, tearing shit apart piece by piece and working through everything again.

I think that She Cat is right on the mark and like you, I am headed back to therapy to resolve some of my unfinished buisness hopefully.

I would also recommend that you move away from the town if the opportunity presents itself. But most surely head back into therapy to learn how to cope and manage your symptoms coming back. I think you will be okay eventually. You are so worth fighting for.

 

[Hush92]

Thanks, I guess this makes sense. Maybe when I was so far away from it all in my other home it was easier to bury some things and not deal with them and here that became harder to do. It's exhausting because it's been about 6 years since I've been safe and I'm just wondering at what point will I finally be over all this? I guess you can't rush recovery though. I'm definitely bringing things up w my therapist this week.


Meaning to say I've been safe for 6 years now