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My Head Feels So Heavy

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Heather

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I saw My nurse practitioner a little while ago and told that I can no longer read books, even on here if someone posts something that is more than 2 or 3 paragraphs my brain can't handle it. Way too overwhelming. If a new member posts an entire paragraph shoved together -- forget it. My brain literally sees all those words and has a spasm.

I can't follow what people say, constantly have to ask them to explain what they mean. I feel like an idiot. I can't remember anything anymore. I have to write everything down now. I can't remember where I put things. She said that this is classic PTSD.

I feel like I'm getting worse not better. My mind feels like sludge and it's becoming harder and harder to function. What the hell? I hate this!
 
I don't know what I'd do if I couldn't read. I find reading and losing myself in a good book very therapeutic. Though I have noticed that I can no longer concentrate for as long as I used to. I could sit for hours and read without stopping. Now every few pages or so I have to get up and move. I can't describe the feeling I get. But I start to get anxious and I need to move about the house, usually checking windows and doors.
 
I've just finished reading an excellent book, the only problem is., if you ask me what happened, I'm blank.

I write everything in my diary especially now I'm committing to drive people to appointments and them I'm bordering OCD checking and rechecking to make sure I have the time right and even worse that I've forgotten someone:oops:.

And if it the remotest bit technical, forget it. Now what was I doing....:p
 
Be patient with yourself. Take it a little bit at a time. Perhaps try writing instead of reading. Just write anything and everything about what happened in your day. I keep a journal and it's great because, as I write, I can change the subject, talk about completely random things, talk about nothing except what makes me angry, complain, moan, and whine, and nobody cares because it's just my journal. Writing might be good excercise for your brain as it works its way back to being able to read more. It's a muscle, the ability to concentrate and read for an extended period of time. And like a muscle, if you work it too hard too soon, you'll strain it.

Also, maybe you could try reading and listening to music at the same time. That's been known to help concentration.
 
I can't remember where I put things.
Have you had things disappear out of your hands before?

For example, the other day I was on my way out the door, and I realized I had forgotten my travel mug in the kitchen. I went back in the house, grabbed my mug, and went back to lock the door when "hey, where are my keys?".

I checked the counter, the car, the door again, but they were in none of the logical places. I went on to check the bathroom, bedrooms, garage, and the rest of the kitchen. Not there.

We'll, I got creative in my searching, and eventually found them in the refrigerator. Yep, right there in the bottom drawer crisper. I didn't even remember opening the refrigerator when I went back to retrieve my mug.

This occurrence is an example of something that happens at least once a day. On a bad day, it seems like anything I touch goes missing.
 
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