ajvander86
New Here
Hi all,
My name is Justin and I suffer from CPTSD. I recently discovered this concept and was so unbelievably relieved to finally find something that fit what has been wrong with me my whole life, and that I wasn't crazy. I think some people believe that growing up in an abusive and neglectful home is ok somehow and that people should just 'get over it'. I can't tell you how many times I've been told I need to 'get over it' and 'stop blaming my parents', all the while it turns out I've been suffering from parental abandonment and abuse that has resulted in me getting cptsd.
As far as I'm concerned, whether one blames someone else or not, they still need to heal. Healing should be the prime focus, not the cessation of blaming one's abusers. But now I know what's wrong with me, I know what I've been suffering from intensely all my life as well as tools of how to cope with and heal many of the tendencies I have. For this I am forever grateful.
But I'm also angry. I've been going to therapists since I was 6 and not one therapists or doctor, not one healer shadow worker or guru ever said, hey, you're suffering from intense and prolonged trauma, here's some compassion as well as some tools to heal from it. NO ONE ever saw it.
But I am grateful that I've found it now and that healing is possible. It has caused me tremendous inner pain and turmoil, as well as cost me many life experiences that I missed out on because I was frozen in cptsd and couldn't connect with people in a real way.
I read Pete Walkers book CPTSD from surviving to thriving and I absolutely loved it. I learned that I am a freeze type who sees people as so dangerous that I avoid and hide the vat majority of my life. It is extremely difficult for me to have genuine, authentic long term relationships with people, and my school life and work life has been greatly comprised as well. This does very much suck, and although healing and help is possible, it is a certain amount of permanent damage done.
Anyway, I think that's enough for now. Happy to have found a community with people who understand exactly what I'm going through. Until next time.
My name is Justin and I suffer from CPTSD. I recently discovered this concept and was so unbelievably relieved to finally find something that fit what has been wrong with me my whole life, and that I wasn't crazy. I think some people believe that growing up in an abusive and neglectful home is ok somehow and that people should just 'get over it'. I can't tell you how many times I've been told I need to 'get over it' and 'stop blaming my parents', all the while it turns out I've been suffering from parental abandonment and abuse that has resulted in me getting cptsd.
As far as I'm concerned, whether one blames someone else or not, they still need to heal. Healing should be the prime focus, not the cessation of blaming one's abusers. But now I know what's wrong with me, I know what I've been suffering from intensely all my life as well as tools of how to cope with and heal many of the tendencies I have. For this I am forever grateful.
But I'm also angry. I've been going to therapists since I was 6 and not one therapists or doctor, not one healer shadow worker or guru ever said, hey, you're suffering from intense and prolonged trauma, here's some compassion as well as some tools to heal from it. NO ONE ever saw it.
But I am grateful that I've found it now and that healing is possible. It has caused me tremendous inner pain and turmoil, as well as cost me many life experiences that I missed out on because I was frozen in cptsd and couldn't connect with people in a real way.
I read Pete Walkers book CPTSD from surviving to thriving and I absolutely loved it. I learned that I am a freeze type who sees people as so dangerous that I avoid and hide the vat majority of my life. It is extremely difficult for me to have genuine, authentic long term relationships with people, and my school life and work life has been greatly comprised as well. This does very much suck, and although healing and help is possible, it is a certain amount of permanent damage done.
Anyway, I think that's enough for now. Happy to have found a community with people who understand exactly what I'm going through. Until next time.
