Gist, he's in no position to tell you anything. It is one thing when our partners trigger us with something innocent and unintentional. It is a whole other thing when a partner does it intentionally, that's not a partner to me. A partner has your back, intentionally triggering someone is not having one's back. If he truly loved you and cared, he would back you up and try and be as understanding as possible. I guess what I'm trying to say is, when you love someone you do everything you can to make them happy. This is far from that, he has no right to tell you what you experience, that's crap. If he is truly sorry he won't do it again, just saying.
I hope you two figure this out or you figure this out, either way keep your head up and stay strong. Best of wishes to you.