My Personal PTSD Successes!

[pandora]

I have a lot that I want to put into this post and I finally have the courage to write it..now that I have started..I am feeling a bit exhausted so I will post a bit and come back tomorrow to fully explain.

My successes are quite a few right now, I beleive and that is amazing. I have a relationship with my Mom...we are working on healthy but that is going to take more time. I also need a clearer head.

I think this sucess...to get a clearer head..is a success. As many of you know I have been on strong narcotics for years due to my spinal cord and back injury. I have deceided to go through a safe meical detox...I go Oct 9-13th...then I start a three week outpatient program to learn all about rehab. A concurrent disorders addiction specialist is also going to come to my home and visit weekly. So.....the dates are set! I may need some help with this one guys. I think any support would be useful right now....

One more thing to add..my son with high functioning autism started highschool this week and he LOVES it...no arguing and he is coming home smiling every day and already told me he just cannot miss any school days this year. I do not think I have seen him that excited in school since he received student of the month the very first september when he started jk....He also joined an extraciricular activity after school...HE JOINED THE DRAMA CLUB. This for my child is a huge hurdle and a very big step...now that is a huge success for both of us.

I still have to tell him about going for the 5 days...Anyone have any suggestions about what or how much I should tell him?

I am trying to let go of the guilt I feel that I allowed this to happen because I have a medical background....I know or knew what I was doing was wrong..my doses are really high. I am afraid to live in chronic pain but I am going to take it one minute at a time when I need to. I just need to let go of the guilt!

The next 6 weeks are going to be very hard, physically and emotionally..I can do this and I want this thread to finish with...I DID IT!!!! I AM MAINTAINING IT. I AM HEALTHY AGAIN! Time to change my entire lifestyle..all for the better for everyone involved. I still am really scared though!!!

 

[BethRSA]

Wow! Lots of GREAT changes. :clap:

Yes, it is scary--because we know the old patterns. But, we need to change. As someone said,
"If you do it the way you always did, you'll get the same results." So, I'm glad things are changing for the better.

I'll be thinking of you doing the rehab.

:Hug_emoticon: Beth

 

[Deleted member 541]

Pand,

Can't tell you HOW PROUD I am of you for doing this. I know that we have talked in depth over this issue, and I really wasn't sure that you would take the steps to do this.... I am SO glad that you proved me wrong!!!!!

I will be here for you in any way that I can....You have my email address, and my phone number, if you need my cell, I can give you that too......

You are doing an amazing job, not only with yourself but with your son too.......Many many hugs to you!!!!!!!

 

[Butigotup]

WOW. Congratulations! Each one of those is an amazing accomplishment. Taken together, that's just incredible. Good luck and know that lots of people are rooting for you.

 

[TLight]

Pand..........really really neat.

To admit and do something about a pattern you slipped into without totally berating and abusing yourself over it is such a mature, self-loving thing to do.

I'm looking forward to hearing about the good experience you have as a result of rehab. At first it may be really horrible. I imagine you'll feel physically terrible. But that will pass.......keep remembering that.

And the news of your son's involvement and joy over life is just heart warming to me!
Thank you for sharing this news!

 

[kers]

Good on you for scheduling the detox! No doubt it will be as hard as you fear, but also as rewarding.

And I'm so glad about your son's comfort and enthusiasm at his new school. To be so content already is no easy feat for any child on the spectrum.

 

[cragger65]

Pandora, wow... you've obviously been working hard on many fronts. Take it slow weaning off the meds, perhaps there is something you could take in conjunction to limit the withdrawal effects. All in all, some amazing successes. Kudos!!!!

 

[Marlene]

Good for you, Pandora. Taking your life by the horns, shaking it up a bit and claiming it for yourself is awesome. You've come so far since you joined the forum.

Adding my voice to the chorus...I'm proud of you!

Lisa

 

[pandora]

Thank you everyone....it still seems so scary and I know I have to just keep telling myself..I am strong..I can do this!

 

[pandora]

Just had to share this here..I had a dream last night with Dr. Phil..he said..YOU CAN DO THIS!!!! I thought it was funny...I love watching Dr.Phil and I love his no bs attitude. Three weeks from right now, I will be there!

 

[midi]

You can do it!

 

[clare]

I'm with you Pandora!

You just keep thinking of your son and how he's faced his fears with school. You can do this!!