My Thoughts Are Out Of Control

[3chrsfor12yrs]

I'm so f*cking sick of trying and almost dying just almost maybe i could if i did this what if i did this maybe then i'm just so f*cking enraged and exhausted of me never being able to commit to anything i want to strangle myself throw myself into traffic get really really hhurt and die because thats what i f*cking diseserv for everything ive done to people i dont have trauma from almost commiting susicide that cant leave me with traumatic issues im just making this up i want to pretend theres somthing f*cked up about me im exhausted im just f*cking done ive never been this angry in my f*cking life im gonna tear my skin apart i hate this i ahhate thi i hate this

 

[The Albatross]

Well you committed to writing and posting this thread so that's a start. Welcome.

 

[The Albatross]

What are your issues?

 

[The Albatross]

You really pretending? You PTSD or are you just regurgitating the frustration that you've gotten from others in your "real" life and driving your own angst cuz your frustrated?

 

[Stickler]

Hi mister. Whatever's going on, it hurts. That's not pretending.

If you feel like pm'ing me, you can. I'm cooking food ATM.

IIRC you have gender stuff going on. Something like over half of transgender people attempt suicide. It's not that unusual.
I'd rather you not try ( again? )
http://www.glbthotline.org/national-hotline.html
It's 24/7, they might help too.