Need Help Getting Revenge On A Sociopath

[The songs of no one]

So where to begin,
Well my brother is gay and started dating this guy and bla bla bla .... anyway i got in to a conversation with my brother and it turns out his boyfriend had a disorder called anti social personality disorder (now found out in a rage of googleing more commonly known as a sociopath) and the way my brother described it made me feel simperfetic towards my brothers boyfriend. Me being autistic can relate to having a disorder. Maybe my brother has never fully understood what this disorder was, because his boyfriend masked it in this terminology as it fooled me this way.

I suffered from a horrific childhood with violence and sexual abuse due to unfortunate sucomstases. And one night I went round for some drinks and my brother also got his hand on some weed, I haven't smoked weed since uni and I was a big smoker with being a art student;). I wasn't going to say no to a good time. So I went round I started having a beer and then the joint was getting passed about ( I know what it sounds like but just bear with me ) then the head games started he started with negative comments towards me, and quickly changing the subject building and building up the negative effects of smoking weed, paranoia. He then started to put on negative songs building it even more making me think the media was even against me. I started to cracking my jaw was shivering my body was shaking and I started to have flashbacks and hallucinations.

I know, I know it just sounds like a bad trip. After that night for a long time i was fighting it thinking it was all in my head thinking i was loosing my mind. but the little shit tried it again one night but I was not drinking or high. He was saying stuff like overthink everything and other things but I can't remember even then I still couldn't believe it it made no sense to me how could a person do this to another person and he's going out with my brother.

For some reason i kept going back round to there house on a friday night manly because he suplyed me with weed and its my brothers house .so i would smoke at home some nights be 100% fine and go round theres and start craking because of him and his head games.

Im geting so angry about the whole thing which is making it worse. I'm trying to f*ck with his head like he has with mine and my brothers catching glimpses of it. now me and his boyfriend having a mental fights with one another, have manged to make my brother think I'm crazy now it has turned us against each other. And Now my brothers joining in with the mental head games.

to make matters worst my brother Had a promising life he had a great job a car he was proud of, now he has no job and his boyfriend made him crash his car in a huge fight they had. And yes they fight, and it's extremely violent to. But my brother keeps going back because he thinks it's love he feels.

He is slowly destroying my brother and I don't think I have any idea how to help him. I see my brothers boyfriend as a leach that is slowly going to feed off my brother tell there's nothing left but a shell. But I'm also thinking the best way to get rid of a leach is to burn them.

I am now damaged for his own entertainment and satisfaction and now he's going for my brother !!! He should to suffer, too!"
Right?
What should I do ?

GOD THIS ALL SOUNDS SO MAD ....

 

[joeylittle]

OK, so you smoked his weed. You kept going back round to smoke. You think he's playing head games. You start playing head games.

And your brother and this guy have a violent relationship. (No-one makes someone else crash a car unless they grab the wheel - so if your brother crashed it because he was mad, that's on him).

I am now damaged for his own entertainment and satisfaction and now he's going for my brother !!! He should to suffer, too!"
Right?

i personally say, 'wrong' - because I don't see how you were actually damaged for this guy's entertainment. That's your theory. I also just think revenge never works. That could just be me.

You might try having a talk with your brother, not about how his boyfriend has treated you, but how he's treating your brother. And you might try and help him, just directly, if you're worried.

As for your own situation - do you have PTSD from your abuse history? Have you done therapy for the trauma?

 

[EveHarrington]

I think that it's hard to "get even" with these kinds of people.

I think it would be best to focus on getting your brother out of that situation.

Can a sociopath even truly feel love? I know some can't.

I think your brother is blinded by "love".

 

[Sideways]

You're right. It does sound mad.

You seem to be focused on the fact that your pot dealer was playing non-specific head games with you (while you were getting high) and playing "negative" music, while the reference to violent fights between them gets only a vague mention. Strange priorities there. Is your brother physically safe?? It's not actually clear from your post who is being violent with who?

And if your brother was behind the wheel when he crashed his car, that would suggest that your brother is responsible for that.

Seeking 'revenge' against your maladjusted (ahem) pot dealer for being maladjusted...maybe you might find more benefit speaking to a counsellor about getting yourself sorted...??

If you were a tad more specific, that might change the perspective, like, a lot...

 

[Thizette]

You can't get revenge on a sociopath--the only feeling they understand is winning, and they will do anything to win. What you should actually do is focus on processing your emotions about what happened, limit or eliminate your exposure to this person, and encourage your brother to get out of the situation.

 

[mamachick]

Thizetee is absolutely right!
Chalk it to experience. Joey explained it very well. Forget it.
You can NEVER win with a sociopath. I would not advise playing that game with this person. Stay as far away as possible.
They are dangerous!

 

[Deleted member 29920]

Agreed that you can't get revenge on them. So don't waste your time.

 

[Neverthesame]

Stop using narcotics recreationally. That should solve about 90% of your problems with this.

If your brother's boyfriend really does have antisocial personality disorder. Trying to play mind games with him, is only going to cause a larger rift between your brother and yourself. He's just going to be better at it than you.

But seriously, quit smoking dope. Trying to blame your paranoia on anything other than the mind altering substance, is just ridiculous.

Try drinking tea. I personally recommend Earl Grey, though I have heard chamomile is good for inducing a calm state of mind.

 

[Gs172003]

It sounds to me like you're blaming your behavior on somebody else but I could be reading it wrong. It also sounds to me like you have self esteem issues that needs to be worked on..again, I could be reading this wrong. Your brother is apparently dating a pot head that's a jerk. Maybe talk to him about that. "Hey brother . I love you. Are you sure this guy is good for you?" Or something along those lines. Brother may not have any plans on staying with the guy long term. But revenge? Not a good idea as it could not only cause a riff between you and your brother but could get your brother in the cross hairs.

 

[Fadeaway]

I have had plenty of fantasies of revenge on my ex who is also diagnosed with anti-social personality disorder. I have also done a lot of research on sociopaths since. Sociopaths don't feel the same emotions we do. The emotions related to consequences are diminished while they get a more intensified feeling from rewards. They don't feel guilt or shame, nor do they feel empathy, they do feel pride and higher levels of excitement with risk taking activities compared to the average person. They are literally the opposite of someone with PTSD.

You can not have sympathy for him having a disorder because believe me, he doesn't suffer from it, sociopaths are quite happy to be that way.

Having autism makes you a more vulnerable victim.

There truly isn't anything you could do for revenge. The only thing you can really do is avoid him completely and be completely supportive of your brother and trey and boost his self-esteem. Abusers tear down a person self-esteem so your brother in need of a boost.

 

[aut555]

Thizetee is absolutely right!
Chalk it to experience. Joey explained it very well. Forget it.
You can NEV...

What ? Why play games with a master manipulater with nothing to lose. He could take both of you down and not blink a eye. Are you kidding me? Where is any concern for your brother? This is the problem with drugs, they skew your reality, you lose sight of the important things, and waste time on revenge. Why bother? Why not do something productive with your life? Drug dealers need your little world screwed up so that you become dependent on their product. Let this jerk go, move on in your life. Or change your provider.

 

[Abstract]

Hi, :) Welcome here.

I imagine your being on the. autistic spectrum must make this even harder to figure out. And harder to get perspective on protecting yourself in interactions with others.


Sometimes we are drawn into situations that are harmful for us. And past harm can hook us into present negative situations. It sounds like your first priority here must be to set up boundaries and protection for yourself. Do you have a therapist and can you make a commitment to yourself and list the ways you will keep distance from this person and situation? And from the drugs?

Please don't even try to continue this interaction with this person. It is obviously harming you. If he has been diagnosed with Antisocial Personality Disorder then there will be a history of long term criminal behaviour of some sort and he isn't someone to be messed with. Doing what you are doing is likely to recreate past abusive dynamics you have had with others and you aren't going to win here.

You can't save your brother sadly. It sounds like he is being drawn into the relationship because of his own vulnerabilities.

Create some distance. Try to keep in touch with your brother from a distance and remind him of his value as a human being. See if you can get him to have some therapy.

Don't try to get into a battle with someone diagnosed with Antisocial Personality Disorder. You are going to cause more harm to yourself. Please take care.