Neediness

[Snowflake]

I might have posted something similar the other day but it's really bothering me. I'm needy, jealous, I have attachment issues and it's driving me crazy. I want to be special and important to my therapist and whomever and if I don't feel I am I'm ready to die. If I see another client before or after my session I feel like she likes her more than me. On another forum -if I don't get a response I'm ready to run-I'm not important. It's like I'm afraid to be alone. This all really became noticeable this week when my after Emdr - it's an internal fear to be unimportant and alone -

 

[Red Feather]

I have serious attachment issues too and I ended up in the hospital because things didn't work out between me and a therapist. I know how hard it is. I wish I could say something more encouraging. Just you're not alone with this and we are not this way because we are innately wrong, just it comes from serious neglect and abuse during our childhood upbringing. I am still struggling a lot but I am doing a lot to help me feel better too, like singing. If you find ways to take care of yourself and the inner part of you that feels so needy, it helps a lot and reduces the clingyness.

 

[MisterCatLady]

That's very common. Have you told your therapist about this? I'm getting the impression you understand these thoughts are irrational and that is seriously half the battle. It feels impossible right now but you're on the right track and you can definitely overcome those feelings. It's actually a good thing that you're having these feelings because they're part of your healing.

 

[Snowflake]

I have serious attachment issues too and I ended up in the hospital because things didn't work out betwee...

Thank you

That's very common. Have you told your therapist about this? I'm getting the impression you under...

Yes we discussed it yesterday and it was really hard and embarrassing-

 

[Bristol]

Just thought id join in and say this is something i majorly struggle with too on most interactions, its why i tend to isolate myself as its much simplier but dont feel alone because you arnt :)

 

[Red Feather]

Also it makes sense that the EMDR makes its stronger, which means that the feelings are coming from the past. Something similar happened to me, because that therapist uncovered something from the past with me and then I got attached to her. It really hurts because in the end she couldn't help me with it and I was left alone with it. So all my trauma came back. It's been really hard, but I am still here.

 

[StormySea]

I have these issues too. No PTSD but I did have an abusive childhood, with an alcoholic dad and two abusive older siblings. It's a struggle for sure and it's embarrassing. I'm trying to get better about being open about it because I know admitting things can take away their power in addition to helping people understand us. Kudos to you for posting about it. Doing regular self love affirmations and meditations to brainwash that out of us helps too.

 

[Rani G2]

's an internal fear to be unimportant and alone -

Snowflake,

very similar emotional structure, though I act out by cutting off everyone when they dont meet upto my expectations. I feel with you Snowflake and I have isolated a lot due to this

I dont let people in, and I fear becoming emotionally needy, so I behave in a way that appears to be "independent". Which means I'm distant and cold.

Its hard, I feel this today and I feel like hiding and never facing the world again.

Purusha

 

[StormySea]

Snowflake,
very similar emotional structure, though I act out by cutting off everyone when they dont...

That's exactly what I do.

 

[MisterCatLady]

This thread is all of the yes. Just if you've commented on this thread then I probably think highly of you as a person. Good work!

 

[Snowflake]

I don't know why it's worse this week it's almost unbearable -

 

[hithere]

This is timely. I have been feeling the shame and self-hatred of this exact thing! I'm actually afraid I have munschausen disorder-or just want to have attention. I can't understand it and I hate it. It's embarrassing. I was completely alone, had to not cry, say anything do anything and go out and perform at my highest level immediately after suffering extreme harsh treatment that was shocking to me (also involved the R word). So I can't figure out why now years later I'm so needy with the person who finally "sees" and validates what I experienced. you are braver than me, because I won't bring this up with the counselor. I'd rather just not show up anymore. I want to just isolate. Going out with friends tonight, and I hated it. I just wanted to go home and hide. I felt like a hypocrite all night.Like I was someone that I'm not.