Sufferer New Here... Ptsd Attack And I'm Looking To Connect

[RavenGirl]

Welcome to the forum, sorry you have to be here but glad you found us! This place has been a great help in my road to recovery and I hope it can help you out too.

It's so nice to have people who understand and that you can talk to openly because they don't judge, people who can give advice, and lend a helpful kind ear when you need it most. Welcome again, I hope you find what you need to help you in your road to recovery. :hug:Raven

 

[Mim28]

Welcome to the forum, sorry you have to be here but glad you found us! This place has been a great...

Thank you Raven. Everyone has been so kind. I hope to be on a new and better path soon.

 

[Ka-9]

Welcome Mim- I can relate very much to your apparent concerns, I haven't been able to work, let alone want to be around people in general for 4+ years. But I do have support from the workplace- well, enough to get by anyways.

Personally, I'm just "out for myself" at the moment, taking in whatever works for me, I don't worry about anyone else's problems anymore- my focus is finding a way out for me, then I'll care about the rest of the world again.

 

[Mim28]

Welcome Mim- I can relate very much to your apparent concerns, I haven't been able to work, let alone wan...

Thank you K. It is helpful to know I am not alone. You said that you haven't been able to work, but work is supportive. Do you work remote? I may have misunderstood. Thank you so much for reaching out.

 

[Ka-9]

Thank you K. It is helpful to know I am not alone. You said that you haven't been able to work, but work...

No- no work at all. Even in school or retraining settings- I've failed, and I've spent all my own $. But.... I keep at it, and am currently training slowly in a field- just not easy.

I don't do any of the old things I used to do- climbing, hiking, etc. So to be honest, if I can't succeed doing things I actually want to do, working a shitty career I don't have any interest in, is likely destined for disaster.

That's what people not affected just can't get right? The brain I have just isn't the one I "used" to have.

 

[Mim28]

No- no work at all. Even in school or retraing settings- I've failed, and I've spent all my own $. But...

Exactly. Right now, my brain is acting like my enemy. I'm trying everything in my power to unloop. Prayers, Mantras, diversion. I did 2 things for work and it took me 4 hours and I fell asleep in between. (I'm home so it's okay). I am an avid reader and I can't even pick up a book. I'm slow at everything I do and tired all the time. I am telling myself this will not be the rest of my life, but I just don't know how long I can stand to be here.

 

[Ka-9]

Exactly. Right now, my brain is acting like my enemy. I'm trying everything in my power to unloop....

No pun intended... but you read my mind- I also was a voracious reader, like a good book in a day or 2, and same! Can't read, Good TV or movies, nope. It has killed my passions or desires.

So, you're in good company lol. But, as frustrating as it is, I got nothing but ticking time to try and defeat the beast- so I figure, hang in and keep trying. Music, humour, they help..... I think it just takes monumental work to pop up a rung at a time. I'm trying to literally force myself to do somthing- plan a hike, ice climb etc. I hope maybe by forcing each event- mybe it re-wires things a bit, gets easier each time.

I think, talking here, or even group (which I'll try again)- helps to tell you it's ok. At least I hope that helps you a bit?

 

[Mim28]

No pun intended... but you read my mind- I also was a voracious reader, like a good book in a day or 2, a...

It helps a lot Ka! I don't see my counselor until Wednesday and I feel like I'm alone on an island. The world is going by without me and I just sit here not even caring what is happening and that scares the crap out of me. I really would like a break or change to just have time to heal. I know I have a small one. 3 months, but I can't helping thinking I will need a lot more.
A few months ago, I was on top of the world, or so I thought. I was slowing deteriorating physically, and now mentally. Since evening seems to be my productive time (not by much) I may try to get a couple things done. At least I will have a sense of accomplishment.
Thank you for sharing your experiences with me. It helps.

 

[Chelsie]

Hi everyone,
I'm new here. Like many others, I'm not new to PTSD, but this latest attack is the worst e...

I definitely feel your pain! I've been able to cope with this on my own for 45 years and now I can't. I just want you to know that you aren't alone. Let your little one be your lifeline. They will need you as time goes on...trust me. I have two grown daughters and two grown step children. Our children never stop needing us. I put my heart and soul into my children and as my parents grew older, I took care of them the best that I could. Now that my children are living their own lives, and live out of state and my parents are gone and my husband is mostly gone...it's just me, my dog and my thoughts..which isn't always good.

Hang in there! I hope you have a really good and knowledgeable therapist. It took me a long time to find a good therapist! I think there's a lot of good people on here that understand! I'm counting on that anyways because I'm new here as well.

 

[Mim28]

I definitely feel your pain! I've been able to cope with this on my own for 45 years and now I can't. I...

Thank you Chelsie.

 

[Chelsie]

Thank you Chelsie.

You are very welcome! (((HUGS))))