You're honestly better off to brace for impact, take a "toughen up" stance and go full-on forward to get through it as fast as possible.
As much as I would love the luxury of being able to focus all my energy on therapy and processing its just not possible. As a parent I need to not traumatise my own child by having her watch her mother become unstable, unreliable and potentially suicidal. She is four, she needs as much stability as I can muster but I do understand where you are coming from its just not an option.
But...
"With safety but not avoiding" means much more likelihood of success, and just about holding my life together at the same time.
...is what I'm aiming for. Its a necessity. My T is a clinical psych, she has many many years experience and I feel safe with her even though she pushes me hard at times. I feel like she reads me better than I can read myself. She was recommended as the best trauma psych in my area and I trust her judgement....with therapy.
As far as the Xanax goes, my GP has given the go ahead to double the dose. My T is appalled. I am piggy in the middle hoping the Psychiatrist has the magic potion. I am currently on the twice daily xanax. It is keeping things level on the good days but when stresses arrive its not really effective.
I fainted the other day and GP says emotional stress. All physical issues were ruled out. Ive never fainted before in my life so it's not usual for me. This is what lead my GP to say stop playing with the medication and take it as prescribed, twice daily. Which in turn has my T pretty irate and me on the path to addiction yet again. Both know my history.
I don't know anymore. Feeling like there is really no hope in living anxiety free.
That bandaid is going to take quite some time to pick away at Britt!
