New Relationships/break Ups. How Do They Affect You?

[Deleted member 32956]

Do they trigger your symptoms?

Break-up's send me straight into abandonment trauma and affective flash...

Can you explain what you mean by the types who don't give space? Emote emote emote?

 

[NatBird]

What I mean ranges from people who are just able to physically show their feelings, tears, anger etc (usually considered as healthy, altbough personally not keen on this) and people who use their ability to show their feelings as a way of dominating/controlling the situation/the other person. That latter would be in the emote emote emote zone. If you put an R in front of the word then the link to controlling is even stronger;)

 

[NatBird]

*to clarify I'm not keen on applying the word 'healthy' to emotional processes.*

 

[Endure]

I'm late to this conversation, but as a supporter I would like to give some input from the other side whose boyfriend who is a sufferer disappeared. I love him deeply and tried for 2 weeks to reach him. If he came back to apologize I would take him back in a second.

I think it depends on how she handled things after you left. Did she try to salavage the relationship? Was she aware of your PTSD and showed a desire to learn and understand?

I tried to let my man know I was willing to do whatever I could to understand and support him. Even though he hurt me deeply, I only showed love and kindness when I tried to reach him. I understand a relationship with someone with PTSD cannot be compared to behaviors in an average relationship. My leeway is so much wider with him than it would be with another man.

So I guess what I'm saying is please reach out to her if she showed any signs of wanting to work on things with you. We woman love yo, and the disappearing acts are so much harder on us than a breakup with closure. If you find someone who wants to walk with you on this journey, do whatever you can to hang on to her.