Newly diagnosed and in a pickle

[Akhos]

Flight or fight response is totally normal, but its massively amplified with PTSD as it is as though, to me at least, your body goes into protect mode before the brain has a chance to process what the threat actually is.

If you are triggered easily by other people, then moving to a foreign country, with a completely different culture, with a girlfriend who doesnt appear to understand what you are going through might not be the best idea. As Eve says above, you cant outrun you, trust me, I tried many many times. Its a relief to think of escaping, your brain will tell you that it will all be exciting and new, and for a short time, it probably will be, but that doesnt last forever. The honeymoon period of anything in life has a shelf life. I think its more important to identify your triggers before you go to another country as that alone may trigger further issues.

 

[InsertCoinsHere]

I don't consider travelling 'running away' from complex trauma as at the end of the trip when I return home I'll be entering therapy to invite those involved in my traumas to discuss the abuse.

I have always planned to travel after finishing my visa, I'll be merely doing it earlier than expected due to my girlfriend's visa finishing and she will have to leave Aus and in addition I'm fed up of doing physical labour that is not of my interest and intended career.

I'm trying to gauge have others with complex PTSD found travelling lengthy periods of time to be relatively manageable concerning stress.

Thanks for the support all.

 

[Akhos]

Mine was manageable to me when I was away, but that was my personality, and I was single so didnt have to think about anyone else and I was living the uni life doing what a male normally does at uni, so I kept myself very busy (not much studying of books however). "relatively manageable" is a hard one as its dependant on the person.

If you think it is best for you, then I hope you have a fantastic time and things work out for the best. :tup:

 

[EveHarrington]

I don't consider travelling 'running away' from complex trauma as at the end of the trip when I...

See, that's the thing.

Nobody who ever tried to outrun trauma ever considered it "running away" either.

We used all kinds of excuses.

Needing a change of scenery.
Getting away from abusive people.
Going away to school.
Finding a new job elsewhere.
And yes, even traveling.
(There are more.)

I have personally done many of these myself.

You can call a duck by any other name, but at the end of the day, it's still a duck.

So yes, I am speaking as someone who traveled to a foreign country at the height of symptomology.

It was ok at first, but in the end I realized it was a stupid thing to do.

Even getting basic meds I took for granted in 1st world countries-----sucked like hell.

Therapy? Hell no!

Just because you have plans to enter therapy later doesn't mean you aren't running away now.

----raises hand-----

I did this, too.

Think long and hard about what you're doing. Realize you are cutting off a number of vital means of support. And you're suicidal. I don't mean to be rude, but I am concerned that you are in major denial. Have you ever been to a third world country before?

And yes, I have complex trauma. I am a CSA survivor.

I'm hitting on all your "requirements" for listening to my advice yet you seem to only want to be told to go traveling to a third world country while suicidal.

And one more thing. I was suicidal when traveling. I still have my struggles now. I had an attempt earlier this year. I thank my lucky stars that not only was I in a 1st world country, but that I was in the USA. My rebound wouldn't have gone so smoothly anywhere else, I know that for sure. (Other countries probably wouldn't have even been able to pull me out of the attempt, let alone given me the mental and physical after care I required.)

 

[InsertCoinsHere]

Thank you for the reply, I'm truly appreciating the support.

You are correct by which my denial is a huge factor in my recovery.. I battle with it daily and feel shame and guilt when I acknowledge the abuse. Only recently are my eyes beginning to open.

Honestly I agree I'll be better to travel when I'm healthier. I have travelled Asia multiple times and well versed and travelling (I rather solo as there's less stress)

Its not that I have "requirements" it's that I feel totally isolated and nobody close to me understands what I'm going through, I'm not sure my Therapist even truly notices, it's only rare moments when I'm defeated and overwhelmed that the T has seen my false self (the mask) get taken off and see my emptiness and hopelessness. We are all suffering.

I don't have a home to return (I cannot return home to where the abuse happened) I thought I might but I'm not too sure I'll fair well in that environment. I don't believe I'd be able to heal there as it's a stressful environment at the best of times. So there's a few concerns in this decision of travel..

A) Relationship (Will we stay together)
B) Financial (Will I have enough money to set up after the trip..)
C) I have no home to return (I really don't want to move back in with the abusers)
D) I don't feel I'm able to work full time, I feel I need to finally be kind to my mind and body after 17 years of pushing on filled with denial and shame. Part time yes but not full time not for now.

I guess I posted on here looking to find someone solve my problems, I constantly get mixed signals from people on what I should do.. Either way I'll have to make the decision myself eventually.. Thanks all

 

[Friday]

I'm looking for advice on whether people here have travelled lengthy periods of time in relatively uncomfortable situations while suffering? What was your outcome?

I'm someone for whom traveling helps on every level. Always has. Love it. Are there sticky spots? For sure. Shrug. There are sticky spots staying stationary, too. So the huge amount of benefit remains, while the negatives pretty much wash out fairly evenly.

 

[Sideways]

Honestly, you seem to have a pretty good grip of what you're doing and what you'll be in for when you go travelling. If you can, and you think it might help? Go for it.

My strong suggestion would be to talk to your T before you go about having a back-up plan if things go pear-shaped. What is it going to look like, for you, if you're really not coping? What should you and your partner be looking out for as signs that it's really not working, and what are things you can do if that happens? Is your T open to you emailing if you run into problems?

Definitely agree that returning to where you were abused is going to be a step backwards for your recovery. Hopefully you get some inspiration for alternatives about what you do and where you go when you're finished travelling.

Ultimately though, if you think this is something you're gonna enjoy? People with ptsd are allowed to travel and make the most of life and enjoy themselves. So if you can? Go for it:)