Nightmares And Hallucinations (trigger Light Possible)

[dutchiedelta]

This whole withdrawal thing... it's getting pretty ripe fast.

Day 7 into taking nothing-at-all sucks eggs.
The symptoms are similar to serotonin syndrome.

Last night was going ape-poo swiftly.
I know there is no graffiti scratched in the paint of the door leading to the hallway.
Very sure there is nobody with a guitar playing the same riff in my ears on loud for 15 minutes on repeat.
And no way, the demons that pop up when I close my eyes are really there. f*ck that!

I'm beginning to question how safe it was NOT to bring up this issue yesterday when speaking with the new GP.
Very sure I shouldn't be driving or operating heavy machinery either.

Not having slept more than an hour each night since sunday is not helping either.
Otoh... being free to see who I am when not drugged to the eyeballs is a novel experience.
It's going to make working on PTSD a whole lot better.

Has someone here gone through a similar episode or do you have information about what to expect?
Would sure appreciate it.

Bit scary to go into the weekend and not have any meds here on the shelf in case the demons try to throttle me in my sleep.
Still behind the decision to go off them.
Mentally easier than thought really.
Physically a mother.
Wasn't expecting to have hallucinations. Never had any in as far as you can tell.

Keep telling myself that the disturbing music, the faces, the needlepins in my skin are not really there. It's just the body adjusting to the serotonin receptors being used properly again.
It'll be cool.
If someone has info on this, very welcome.

 

[atilla]

hang in there Sister. You got this.

 

[JarHed]

Hey Dutchie,

The first question that I would ask is did you just quit taking the med or meds or did you taper off of them.

I was on a depression med a while back, a SSRI, it helped when I needed it but I got no help from the doctor on how to get off of it. Did my research and realized the need to taper off very slowly. It's this way for any and all meds that you take. I don't care what the doctors say. You have to reduce the amount slowly over a long period of time. The longer that you've been on it the longer it will take to get off of it.

Perhaps the first question I should have asked is getting off your meds your doctors idea or yours? Consider going back on them for a while to 'get normal' feeling before you try to get off of them again. You shouldn't be having the kind of side effects you describe. Hope you feel better soon.

Jar

 

[dutchiedelta]

It was my idea Jarhead and the dr was happy at how I took off 3 of the 5 meds.
After falling out with him I changed drs and didn't mention this in the short time we had yesterday.
It's day now, sunny and the noise from the road behind me nearly puts music in the ears again.

Told son in fairness what was going on.
Just in case it goes A&E but shouldn't think so (yep famous last words)

Meaning to stick it out.
While I don't care being an addict, I do care depending on the dr or a system that could switch off my meds.
Besides, there is no treating me when all emotions are huddled up inside and no clue who I am once the VA here gets to work.

 

[BaMuoiBa]

Dutchie, hang on there kiddo....

Jar is ABSOLUTELY correct! "The longer that you've been on it the longer it will take to get off of it." Strap yourself in, best wishes!

Ba

 

[dutchiedelta]

Ow scheisse.
As in.... the demons and bass guitar are coming back?
It feels worse today.

 

[Friday]

Aw f*ck...Here's a paranoia jab for you... I'm kicking myself for not thinking of it in the moment, but given the malpractice of your last GP, I'd ring in and see if it's even safe for you to be off of these meds without the taper. Some have lethal side effects when gone off abruptly. There are chemical bridges that can be used to mind that gap. Even if his intent was good, thinking you'd be inpatient before seizures started because he's a f*cking idiot...well. See part 2 under idiot. Ring the pharmacist at your local hospital, yeah? GP told you to go off XYZ, he's being stripped of his medical license, and your side effects have you (or your friends) worried he may have thrown you under the bus.

 

[JarHed]

I both understand and agree with being on as little and as few meds as possible. You're right that the system is such that you don't know what they'll do next. I too try to control it myself, as much as possible.

I'd still consider a small dosage at this point to help ease so of your symptoms, then when you feel more stable ween yourself off them. Hate knowing what you're going through. Hope it gets better.

Jar

 

[dutchiedelta]

Friday, didn't think of that.
He did ef up majestically.
He might have been wrong again in thinking this wouldn't hurt one bit.

Jarhed, I don't mind about the .... physical stuff.
Right now it's melting the brain it seems and that is physical.
Only another night with the gremlins is not cool if it gets dangerous.

 

[OldDoorGunner]

dutchie, if you are coming off Benzos, you do need to taper off them slowly......seizures are a big risk when a person does not taper off..........

J R

 

[dutchiedelta]

It's cool.
Right about this being from withdrawal.
Thank you.

 

[Deleted member 43454]

Best of luck Dutchie!