WishfulThinking123
MyPTSD Pro
Heres the deal... I am so used to being in an extreme. Either self harming by some kind of extreme behavior like the cutting, promiscuity, drinking, etc... I dont really know how I am doing? I dont know if this makes sense but, since I am not doing any of those behaviors I feel inclined to be like all my problems are solved and I'm great when I see my T... but this is erroneous thinking since I dont go to T for those things but, rather for the trauma thats caused me to turn to those behaviors in the first place. I'm so mentally tired and just I dont know...I have no idea where I'm at in this therapeutic process... no idea how I'm doing.... How do you know when the past still needs to be explored and how do you know when you're ready to leave it behind and its not going to creep up on you again in another month.... I just feel like in this limbo right now... I feel the urge to self harm as its easier to talk about or at least lets me know where I'm at...I know this may sound so strange and like a bunch of ramblings...