Sexual Assault Out Of Place? :-(

[IWIK]

Is there anybody else who's attack was a random act of violence by somebody unknown? It seems everywhere I read, everybody else either was a victim of childhood assault or molestation or else they knew their attacker through a prior relationship of sorts. I've been lurking a long time...kind of afraid to post. Kinda feeling out of place as I don't seem to relate to those particular scenarios that I've described.

 

[Nicolette]

Hi @IWIK . You are not alone and off the top of my head I can think of a number of members whose assault was a random act of violence. Here's a post from an old member, I'm hoping current members will speak for themselves.

A Night I Can Never Forget

 

[GWhizz]

I'm sorry you are finding it that way. Unfortunately I cannot relate specifically though I know for sure there are similar members and also lots of us who have experienced both an unknown and a known abuser. Try not to feel like it makes you any less of a victim or any less welcome here. We are all survivors no matter the detail, it shouldn't have happened and we have to cope now with the ptsd symptoms now, not ignoring the incident(s) completely but at the same time, focusing more on our recovery and how we now relate to stressful situations/triggers.

I hope you find the site good. Welcome :-)

 

[Fraser46]

I was attacked whilst working abroad in February 2012, I was walking towards my apartment block when I was mugged and held to the ground by 3 youths. The men walked past me about 50m from the entrance and then grabbed me from behind and pulled me to the ground. During the attack, I was restrained whilst they stole my passport, flat keys, purse, bankcards and mobile phone. I sustained a fractured skull, fractured jaw, cuts, 3 broken ribs,bruises (to my face, arms and stomach), and hypothermia. I was badly shaken and lost consciousness shortly after the attack and spent a few days in hospital being observed. I think the worse thing about the attack was that the police didnt listen to me, they didnt want to hear that 3 white Russians had attacked me and tried to turn it into a racial attack. I had to remain in Moscow for 4 months after the event due to visa restrictions/no passport. To my knowledge the police were never interested in catching my attackers which I still find very difficult to deal with .

 

[Ghostybear73]

You are definitely not alone. I have had traumatic events throughout my life by both people whom I knew and strangers. I almost feel like a magnet on the trauma board or like I have a sign on my forehead that says I'm vulnerable to attack.

 

[IWIK]

Thank you....

 

[Underdog]

You are not alone at all. I am still learning my own events that led to this. However, I have been attacked many, many times throughout my life. I've been through police raids targeted towards minorities like myself all with the end game of destroying our futures with police records and getting us expelled from universities, lived in a rough neighborhood where gun fights/stand offs would occur frequently as well as stabbings and muggings (somehow I've survived them all even with the bullets flying by me), been attacked in my sleep by both people I knew but mostly by people I didn't and still don't know (nor do I know why to this day). They have all impacted my life deeply and in more ways than I ever truly knew.

I hope you will find this community a safe zone to talk with others. It's not easy and you are very brave to even ask the question!

 

[Justmehere]

I was attacked by a random stranger on the sidewalk near a grocery store in broad daylight. Perp was a complete stranger on every way. You are not alone.

Plus, even if the type of traumas are different PTSD is PTSD.

 

[joeylittle]

You're not alone. Everything that has happened to me has been strangers. Don't let yourself think that you don't belong here, or that you don't have a story worth telling. Random acts of violence, unknown people, never to be heard from again. I'm 100% in that category. Stories are different but as @Justmehere says, PTSD is what it is.

 

[Friday]

Trauma seems to beget trauma.

I've had some that are purely wrong place / wrong time.
I've had some that is a direct result of my (old) job.
I then made a series of bad decisions probably based on PTSD which led to more.

Each seems to pave the way for the others.

My cousin, after a random event... Started doing some very recognizable things to anyone with PTSD. So I sat her down and laid out my stuff for her. The "Don't be me" speech. So, unlike me, she got into treatment fairly early. She still has PTSD, but she's managed to avoid most of my mistakes by getting in with a trauma therapist. I relate to far too much of what is on here, because I spent 15 years winging it. If there is a cliche to sink your teeth into, or a stat to run into head first? A way to do things "wrong"? I did that.

As I'm reading through people's stuff I think there is no way ABC is going to relate to XYZ. Oh. Crap. And there, there, there. Dang. I do relate best to people who had my initial trauma. Where things first went sideways. It's the first time I haven't felt alone. I've heard people say that, through the years in different places... AA / DV / Rape/ PTSD, etc. But until I found that group I still learned a lot, and I mean a whole helluva lot, but that feeling of belonging wasn't present.

One of the things I very much like on here, is that it's so diverse. There are a handful of people like me, and a whole lot of people different than me. The difference helps, because sometimes I really need that distance. And the similarities help, because sometimes I need to see myself in others to really see myself.

I've felt on the outside, too different to relate to a lot of specialized groups. Here? There's always someone like you. And probably several someones.

 

[IWIK]

So, do the flashbacks and triggers every completely just disappear?

 

[RussH]

@IWIK You are not out of place here. Although most of the people here who have been attacked, sexually or otherwise, were attacked by someone they new, the fact is they were still attaked and traumatized. So, anyone of them can relate to how you feel.

You are welcome here on the fourm, and most certianly not out of place. You are among people here who will become your friends, and support network.

We welcome your post, and feel free to ask questions, and be willing to offer others moral support. You belong here.