Panic Again

[Jnean]

since my emdr session yesterday I had three small panic attacks but grounding worked so I was okay I guess it was with in minutes but felt like longer to me. I have a hard time not thinking of what I uncovered yesterday which is okay cuz I know I'm working through things and have support. During some thoughts my body has a reaction as if its happening to my body again almost the same type of reaction as if I enjoyed it and this is what led to my panic. I of course do not enjoy my abuse and it makes sense to me but I still can't seem to stop the overwhelming disgust for myself and the panic afterwards although it seems I am alright once I do some grounding. I'm just glad that's been working. It's pretty scary. I just hope I can to a point of no disgust for myself, not sure if that will stop the panic but at least the nauseated feeling my whole self feels may be able to stop.

 

[willing]

Hi jnean ~ I relate on the disgust with myself feelings. Right now I can't be much support other than to let you know you are a true warrior to be able to risk enough to reach out for support and to continue despite the opening up (ripping apart) to pain. Keep up, breath, and know the work is paying off.

 

[Nikie]

((((:hug: ))). Jnean I dunno what to say to you because I can not relate to that .. But I can offer you a warm hug .. If okey with you?..you are doing great by doing the grounding and stuff ..:tup:
Hope you feel better soon!!

 

[Jnean]

thank you

 

[Klo]

In my perception it's just the body's version of Stockholm Syndrome. When someone develops Stockholm Syndrome, it's not appropriate to judge them for bonding with the perpetrator, it's not their fault that they were mentally broken down in such a way as to resort to such an extreme coping mechanism. It's not like they actually liked the perpetrator. If a person's body is violated and they are forced to feel a physical sense that would normally be associated with a positive experience, it is not the body's fault, nor is it the victim's fault. If we can understand such a complex mechanism as Stockholm Syndrome, then surely we can also understand the body's own version of it.