Relationship Questions about therapy

[Glara]

I was just wondering about therapy. Is it exhausting? Ed told me he's increased his therapy time, he really doesn't want to go to a hospital but his symptoms are very severe. I don't know what kind of therapy he is doing. I don't ask, I'm not sure he wants to talk much about it. From the things I read I imagine it could be very exhausting.

I was wondering what it's like for both sufferers and supporters.

 

[Sweetpea76]

When my vet was getting therapy he'd get in the car afterwards and immediately fall asleep before I could pull out of the parking lot. It wiped him out mentally, emotionally, and physically.

 

[Glara]

@Sweetpea76 did it help? Ed had been in such a bad place lately. It's been going on since spring. I'm so worried. I had asked a while ago about increasing his therapy but he said insurance wouldn't cover it. He was considering checking himself in to inpatient but really hated it the last time. So I guess he was approved for more therapy.

He's always used work to in order to avoid what's in his head. Whenever he's not working he can't deal with his thoughts. Anyway, he works excessively and now has increased therapy sessions. I'm just guessing he's wiped out. (He doesn't live near me)

I don't really know what they do in therapy, I've read a little but don't really understand.

 

[Sweetpea76]

His inpatient stay was helpful...the regular outpatient VA therapy not so much. He couldn't get in regularly so he stopped going.

My vet could probably do with another round of inpatient honestly. He is basically untreated at this point in time and hasn't been doing well either.

 

[Glara]

So sorry he’s not doing well, believe me, I understand. Ed was ready to check in but he won’t do it. He has guns(which scares me to death, the stats on suicidal men with guns) but if he goes inpatient he can’t keep his guns. They represent safety for him. He’s always on alert and he doesn’t feel safe. I don’t tell him what to do, I wish he’d give up the guns and go intpatient but he won’t. I’m hoping the increased therapy will help. He will go to that, he’s been going once a week for years.

I just worry.

 

[LuckiLee]

It's different all the time. Depends on what transpired in the session. J does one on one and group therapy. I do ask how it went (after I've gauged his mood) so he knows he can share. Sometimes he does sometimes he says he doesn't want to talk about it.

I do know his anxiety is elevated the day / night before. And yep he's physically and emotionally spent after. (but not always)

P.S. @Sweetpea76, Do you guys have a vet center near you? They're alot different than the V.A. J seems to like it much better. He's been with the same group of guys for 4 years. Closest thing to friends he has even though he doesn't socialize with them. :(

Good luck everyone! XO

 

[Snowflakes]

@Glara Therapy is very exhaustive for my sufferer. Like sweetpea76’s vet, mine would go to sleep in the car and crawl into bed when we got home. For me as her supporter, her therapy takes a lot of pressure off of me. Often she will isolate after therapy which gives me some down time.

With respect to my own therapy, it’s not exhausting.

I don’t know what to tell you about his guns. While we have guns in our house, I’m cautious and careful with their storage but not concerned. All the times she tried to kill herself and subsequently sent in-patient, she used pills. Sometimes our best precautions are just not good enough. Worries me sick so I just pray a lot and depend on her therapist.

Take care.

 

[Sighs]

MIne finally started seeing a psychologist in July. He's only seen her a few times and the last time she told him she's taking 3 months maternity leave. He already told me he doubts she/ll come back to work and that he has no intention of finding someone else. So I guess after his session later this month and one more in December he'll go back to being untreated. Sigh!

 

[LuckiLee]

Oh @Sighs that sucks. Don't let him give up. I'm sure his T is referring her patients to someone else.

@Glara. My guy has about a dozen guns. However, he gave them to his BIL for safe keeping years ago when he was in a bad place and Ambien was the drug of choice to throw at patients. Not a good combo.

I'm so glad he didn't have them five years ago when PTSD hit the fan and he was suicidal. Too easy to make a bad decision. The time it took him to make a noose was enough to change his mind and plead for help. I understand your concern.

I really don't have any advice because it's entirely up to your guy how this plays out. Whatever he decides you need take care of yourself too. Are you?

XO

 

[Freida]

It is brutal, brutal, brutal. I said this in another thread today but I don't remember where ...oops!

I think when you hear "counseling" there is a tendency to think that we are just chatting about how our day went. In reality it is digging up horrible things I have hidden from myself to stay alive. I dig them up, remember them, re experience them and then try to find new ways to cope with these horrible memories in the here and now. It is exhausting . And then they want me to figure out which f**king feeling I'm supposed to be feeling and how it connects to the horrible memory and what was I feeling then and what am I feeling now and if I don't have feelings where did they go and how do I dig them up and try to do feel them and so on and so on.

And if you add EMDR it's even more awful because then you actually re feel the whole thing. As in all the physical and emotional pain you were feeling back then

I tell my supporters it is like chemotherapy on your soul. You sweat and sometimes you puke and sometimes you cry. When it is over I'm completely wiped out. I usually come home..soak in some salts to try to get the muscle spasms to stop and then have nightmares s all night. The next day I'm useless. It takes about 24 hours to recover

Guns? No where near me during that 24 hours. Way to dangerous

 

[EveHarrington]

It can be exhausting.

My therapy days are completely empty so I can recover.

A vast improvement----

I used to need 2-3 days to recover. (Which is why I was out of therapy for so long.)

 

[Never_falter2]

I was just wondering about therapy. Is it exhausting? Ed told me he's increased his therapy time, he real...

Glara, Are you with your guy again or are you just friends. Just curious.